Twin jokes
Twin monks who ring the church bells died.
Now they are dead ringers. :)
I've been sad recently that the Twin Towers aren't around, so I made the conclusion to build a time machine to watch it again.
What do you tell twins who are in love with each other?
Go fuck yourself!
Hey, my man, why you got them damn old, stanky-looking Whoopi Goldberg cornrows on you head? Are y'all twins, or boyfriend and girlfriend, 'cause if y'all are, go get married in Color Purple land.
What did the drummer call his 2 twin daughters?
Anna 1 Anna 2.
What did the plane say to the Twin Towers?
Nothing, planes can't talk.
My wife is so ugly when she was born, the doctor said, "I did everything I could, but she pulled through anyways." When she was born, the doctor hung himself with the umbilical cord. He pushed her back in, said, "Not done." The doctor slapped her mother. The doctor looked at her and said, "Twins!" He didn't know what end to slap. He threw her away and kept the afterbirth.
What’s Whitney Houston’s favorite type of coordination? HAAAAND EEEEEEEEEYYYYEEE!
What’s better than Ted Danson? Ted singing and Danson!
What did the drummer call his twin daughters? Anna one, Anna two!
I bought some shoes from a drug dealer. I don’t know what he laced them with, but I was tripping all day!
What does a nosey pepper do? It gets jalapeño business!
Famous last words.
Twin towers: “Is it a bird, is it Superman? AAAAAHHHHHH SHHHHHIIIIIIIIIZZ!”
Why didn't Superman save the Twin Towers?
Because he's a quadriplegic.
What's the Twin Towers' most favorite band? Al Qaedirection.
I asked someone why they were crying. They told me that they had to abort their twins.
Then someone yelled "DAMN DOUBLE HOMICIDE!"
What do the Twin Towers and murder victims have in common?
Both were owned by their own kind.
WOW! I CAN SEE THE TWIN TOWERS FROM HERE.
Why were the Twin Towers mad during 9/11?
They ordered pepperoni pizza, but instead got plane.
What's the best thing about 9/11 jokes...
They make you collapse with laughter because the Twin Towers collapsed.
America Twin Tower: "Hey, have you seen the Malaysian Twin Tower? I have, but only from 1971 to 2001."
Malaysian Twin Tower: "I STOOD LONGER!"
What happens when the Twin Towers breathe? They collapse like an orphan with stage 4 cystic fibrosis who lives in the streets of Africa.
I was at the beach today, and there was a big wave.
Somebody went, "Damn, that crashed harder than the Twin Towers." Jack may have survived the towers, but not the crash.
Okay class, who can tell me who the fastest readers are?
The pilots of 9/11 went through the Twin Towers, 6 in 3 seconds.