Donald Trump Jokes
Someone asked the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton why she lost the 2016 presidential election to Donald John Trump, and the former 2016 presidential candidate Hillary Clinton said, "Because someone asked her what she would do for a Klondike Bar?"
Donald Trump took the bullet better than Joe Biden took the stairs.
Do you think when the Secret Service heard the gunshot they were like, "Donald Duck"?
How did the Shaggy defense become successful for JD Vance?
He was not banging on the sofa. Rather, he was banging the sofa!
Donald Trump secretly admires Joe Biden. How do I know?
He attempts to imitate "Sleepy Joe" by falling asleep during his court cases and during part of the Republican National Convention!
How can you tell Donald Trump is old and demented?
He can't distinguish between tanned people and cockroaches!
For all the talk of Donald Trump loving America, most of his lovers are imported from Eastern Europe.
If Donald Trump is running against Bill Clinton, it's safe to say that we are witnessing the Lolita Express Erections...oops, I mean Elections.
I'm shocked about Donald Trump escaping the transgender accusations. Trump is more talkative than any of the popular girls I went to school with! Not to mention Trump's tweets...
It's no surprise Donald Trump moved to Florida. That's where the oranges are.
"Monica Lewinsky has gone down on Bill Clinton several times. What's stopping her from having a one-night stand with Donald Trump?"
"Trump is nothing more than a little pussy, don't ya know?"
Just because someone is white doesn't mean they are bad.
Sure, white Americans all treat Trump like a deity and are proud of their heritage of enslaving blacks.
But Canadians and Australians don't throw a hissy fit every time they see someone not white, and they don't think Europe is a country.
How did Donald Trump win Alabama twice?
By declaring that he has a crush on his daughter!
What's the difference between Donald Trump and Derek Vinyard?
A shaved head, a chest tattoo, and a moustache.
What did Donald Trump serve Justin Trudeau at the state dinner?
Poutine in traditional Russian dressing!
Why is Donald Trump so jealous of Usain Bolt?
Because he successfully finished a race!
So Americans strongly worship Donald Trump, eh? Well, let's put that claim to the test by throwing him into the general population of Rikers Island.
I may not be as "rich" as Donald Trump, but at least I am still allowed to go on holiday to Bali, Niagara Falls, Hong Kong, and the Pyramids of Giza.
Orange Jesus can't travel to these places because these places cannot grant entry to felons.
...ah, who am I kidding? It's likely that Trump is going to prison, anyway.
Why are Republicans supporting giving felons the right to vote?
Because their own personal jeebus is a felon!
Why is Donald Trump so desperate to break into the White House?
Most landlords cannot lease their properties to him due to the fact that he is a felon.