Why couldn’t people use the George Floyd action figure? Because it was vacuum sealed.
One time, little Johnny was watching TikTok, and he saw a toy that he wanted so badly, so he cleaned up the whole house and did his homework. When he was done, he saw a spill on the table. He went to the sink to grab a cloth, but when he came back, it was gone. He went to his mom's room and saw a drink with the label "daddy's drink," so he drunk it and said, "It's daddy's; he won't mind," and all day he was like the Flash. So he went back, turned the bottle around, and it said "Speedy," and then he said, "Oh, great heavens!"
I found two of the same Lego Duplo sets, so I called ‘em “Duplocates.”
Why was Tickle Me Elmo upset when he left the factory?
Because they only gave him one test tickle.
POV: Get a banana cleaner and use it as a sex toy.
When your little brother knocks your two Jenga towers you made with his toy airplane,
You: "Hey, stop trying to recreate the Twin Towers!"
Father: I am taking your toys to the orphanage.
Son: Why?
Father: You’ll need them there.
What do you call a wheelchair on fire?
Hot Wheels.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite toy?
Hot Wheels.
What's Michael Jackson's favorite toy?
Wet 6-year-old balls.
What does Joe Biden call a room full of kids? A toy room.
Why is it that orphans love Frisbees so much?
Because they return eventually.
Why do orphans like boomerangs? Because they actually came back...
Timmy had 66 toys. He said it was "2 many (662)," so he gave them to Mr. Divide. He gave 21. Equals flip it over! It’s weird.
What do you call a stripper in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
Father: I'm taking your toys to the orphanage.
Child: But why?
Doctor: I'm going to have to turn you away.
Orphan: But why?
So I gave a disabled kid hot wheels. I mean cars, no I gave him literal hot wheels!
Why don't Chinese people believe in Santa Claus?
They're the ones that make the toys.
There's a disabled kid in my class, right? Oops, should've brought my Hot Wheels tracks.
What does a rubix cube and a penis have in common? The more you play with it, the harder it gets.