Worst Jokes Ever
What is a definition of tight?
A. Putting a blind man in a round room and saying, "Your dinner's in the corner."
I impaled my son with a pitchfork...
He looks very sharp.
What happens when you say, "Hey Siri?"
Stephen Hawking answers.
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To get to the other side.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
The chicken.
My life...
Once, there was a Minecraft child molester on the Minecraft Facebook. He asks a kid his age. The kid blocks him.
You're the bus driver. The bus driver picks up twenty kids, drops two, picks up eighty. Drops seven, picks up a woman with green eyes, drops off a man with blue, kicks a kid in the face, and buried his mother.
Who's the bus driver?
You will never nose [know].
Why is the homeless homeless?
Because it's homeless.
Why does Ella have cancer?
Because she’s stupid.
What's the difference between Stephen Hawking and a baby?
Both of their legs don't work.
Why did the bird lay an egg on Stephen Hawkings?
Because he is Stephen HAWKings.
Why did the boy drop his ice cream?
He got hit by a bus.
My girlfriend broke up with me because I have a small dick. Too bad for her, because I give good sex.
What do cows eat for breakfast?? Steer cereal.
Rape, 9/11, abortion, orphan, murder, dead, kill, drugs.
Am I funny now? Because this is what you brainlets find funny.
My sister's boyfriend is mad because I fucked his girl.
I was talking to my old friend. They said, "We should hang out more!"
I said, "You mean we should ketchup?"
SHAENAYA WANTS TO SUCK EVERYBOYS DICK BESIDES MINE CAUSE SHE A THIRSTY HOE.
In the beginning of the 20th century, a young girl called Edit left her home country of Sweden and crossed the Ocean to make a new life in America. Unfortunately, it did not go all that well, and she soon found herself homeless, begging for food or money to survive.
She used to occupy a street next to a theater, not because it meant hefty handouts, but because it was a place where no other beggars or police bothered her. Every night, a new crowd came to see a show, and the cute young girl found just enough mercy to survive. In fact, she did so well that she decided to afford herself a small piece of cake every Tuesday, just to keep her spirits up.
One Tuesday, she could not get a break. Looked like she will go without cake this week. Then, a strange-looking gentleman stopped near her. He soon heard her story and decided to share his fortune.
Gentleman: "I work as a magician in the touring show; today, we performed here. Some nights, our guests want to gamble with us afterwards, and I make sure to bring home more than I came with. I try to keep it moderate, but today, this obnoxious drunk was loaded, so I emptied his pockets. Here, take this precious coin."
Why did not the toilet paper make it across the road to escape the corono virise?