Worst Jokes Ever
What kind of punch hurts a kid the most?
A sandy hook.
What are the similarities between an American teen and an old Muslim man?
They both choose who they want.
How does a butcher keep his tent up in the wind? Steaks.
Jasper likes little girls and Bin Laden.
Applesauce.
A man walks into a bar and says, "Ouch!"
Yo mama so ugly, she had to ask Satan to help her give birth!
Why didn’t Stephen Hawking go to heaven? Because it’s a staircase, not a ramp.
What did the guy with no teeth say to a blind guy... How many fingers am I holding up?
You are American when you walk into the bathroom, and you are American when you walk out.
But do you know what you are when you're in the bathroom? European.
Muslims don't need weed, they've got the Koran.
You burn that sh*t and you're gonna get stoned.
Roses are red, violets are violet.
Ur mom gay, lol.
Today I saw my son lick out a tub of butter. I told him to make a sandwich without butter for a week (as a punishment). He said, "Okay," and licked the bread. "It's really easy to spread," he said. LOL!
What do you call a dog that's faced backwards?
A god.
What's Stephen Hawking's shampoo?
Head and Shoulders. 😊
What do you call a person with no arms or legs lying face first in a river? Bob.
What do you call two people with no arms or legs standing in front of a window? Curt and Rod.
I'm taking a guitar lesson at school. My band instructor told me he was going to hit me with my guitar. I asked him if that was a "fret."
Why can’t Stephen Hawking go to Heaven?
Because there wasn’t a ramp.
Why was Stephen Hawking good at football? Because he is a pro dribbler.