Worst Jokes Ever

Ever had a migraine? Yeah, sorry that’s my fault. Couple years ago, all my grains got loose.

What is the difference between an emo and a normal person?

An emo slits.

What is sex? You put a sex person in someone’s sex.

Did you hear about the shark that ate a key shop?

I think it got lockjaw after that.

Stephen Hawking, more like ice cream!

Why does Stephen Hawking only do one liners?

He can't do stand-ups.

The baby water bottle said to the mommy water bottle, "Mommy, I lost my teddy bear." The mommy water bottle said, "Why don't you RECAP on what you said?"

Q: What does a cat have that no other animal has?

A: Kittens.

Your mum is so ugly that aliens don’t come here.

My friend thinks he is funny.

He told me that the only food that makes you cry is an onion, so I threw a coconut at him.

Q: What breed of dog is supposed to laugh at all of your jokes?

A: A Chihuahua.

Q: Why do Skeletons hate the cold?

A: It sends chills up their spine.

Ahhhhhhhhhh, ma bored.

Stephen Hawking died when he ran out of data for the month.

What do you call a male ladybug?

Trans.

What's a Mexican's favorite sport? Cross country.

Why was Santa Santa?

Because it was Santa! Hahahaha 😂😂😂😂😂😂

Is your refrigerator running? "Yeah, I guess." Well, you better go catch it! Haha, I'm a girl, it's funny!

Why do cantaloupes always get married in the church?

'Cause they can't elope.

Me: Why did the bus drop his ice cream?

Sanity to live: I don't know?

Me: He was run over by Timmy!!!

Sanity to live? *dies*

Me: *At edge of bridge* Wow, sweet view.

Sanity to live: *resurrected*

Narrator: Sometimes a bridge is all you need...

(sponsored by jumping bridges)