Worst Jokes Ever
What's the difference between a cop and bacon?
Bacon is full of fat and makes you feel good. A cop is full of shit and will make you feel their hot steamy cock as they ram it up your ass with some justice sprinkled on top.
What do Boy Scouts and IG models have in common?
They both be fucking sugar daddies.
What comment did the United States Senator Kamla Harris make when one of her 64% blue dog democrat constituents called her incompetent?
"Sometimes I sits and thinks, and sometimes I just sits!"
Your hairline is so far back that if you were a backbencher in class and I was a germ sitting on it, I would think that the rest of the backbenchers are seated in front of the class.
Unfortunately, NASCAR has been canceled.
The woke people heard that it was a human traffic ring.
A fat homeless person begged me for food, so I said, "I can see your dinner. You had plenty!"
What’s a rapper’s favorite exercise?
Heavy bars.
"Rajesh get on bus, so many people, squeeze here squeeze there. He daydream about naughty stuff, like coffee spill but not coffee. Bus move, stop, he press close to pretty lady, she smell nice. Rajesh think how funny if something else spill, make whole bus ride wild." He laugh to self, bus ride never boring now!
What instrument do skeletons play?
The Trombone!
Why didn't the child go to school?
Because he died of a heroin overdose.
What is the difference between Paul Walker and the Queen?
Paul Walker passed 100 before he died.
What do sexists and WNBA fans have in common?
There's enough of them to acknowledge their existence.
What's the difference between yo mama and German men?
The balls... German men don't have them.
What did Tupac's homies smoke? His ashes.
It would've been too tacky to take a shot in his memory.
Q: What do gay horses say?
A: "Geigh!"
Who gets more dick, straight male rap fans or straight male swifties? Answer: Straight male rap fans, because there’s no such thing as a straight male swiftie.
What's your mom and a dog got in common?
Both will lick dick if you put peanut butter on it.
What does your mom say when she is working?
Nothing, it's rude to talk with your mouth full.
Why did the rapper become a barber?
To trim his verses.
What’s worse than banging your sister?
Having to wear your dad’s wedding ring.