Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the cow want to be an astronaut?
Because it wanted to see the Milky Way!
Crazy? I was crazy once, they put me in a room with rubber rats. Rats make me crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once...
There was someone who slept late... he missed the dream!
There were four people who went to land... only three returned... Why?
They left someone for memories!
The pinnacle of loyalty is that an ant married an elephant, and after he died, she spent her entire life burying him :)
I pushed a kid in a wheelchair into the school fire and said, "Hot wheels!"
How do you stop a baby from crying?
You drown it.
When I was recently standing in front of a huge puddle with my buddy, I remembered how he tricked me a week ago. So I tricked him...
What did the Japanese man say to his friend after he killed somebody?
"That is very Wong."
A guy walks into a bar with a revolver and yells, “WHO THE FUCK FUCKED MY WIFE!”
A man in the back responds, “YOU AIN'T GOT ENOUGH BULLETS MATE!”
How does a skeleton call his friends?
On the tele-bone!
My friend is an amazing hacker. He cut down 23 trees already.
My local hacker contacted me and told me that he hacked my computer.
I responded, “Show me proof.” He provided the username and password for my email account, bank account, video game accounts, and social media accounts. To be honest, that is the fastest “Forgot Password” procedure I’ve ever done.
You are recently injured because of your job as a driving instructor, so you couldn't go on vacation with your friends.
Your friends tell you that they have an Asian pilot.
You realize, "They have a -1% survival rate!"
This is a link to a YouTube channel. No joke text provided.
Don't click the link.
Yo mama so fat, the only letters that she knows are KFC.
The other day, I stumbled upon a comic strip in the newspaper. As I started reading, I could feel a smile creeping onto my face. The characters were so relatable, their situation so absurd, yet so familiar, it was impossible not to find it amusing.
The punchline was unexpected, yet it made perfect sense within the context of the story. It was that surprise, that sudden twist, that made me burst out laughing. It was as if the comic strip had set up a joke and I had walked right into it, completely unsuspecting. The laughter bubbled up from within me, a spontaneous reaction to the unexpected humor.
In that moment, I realized the power of humor. It's not just about making people laugh. It's about bringing joy, about making people see the world from a different perspective, even if just for a moment. And that's why I found that comic strip so funny. It wasn't just a joke, it was a moment of joy, a moment of surprise, a moment of seeing the world in a different light.
Q. What’s black and blue and doesn’t like to have sex?
A. The little girl in my trunk.
Q. How does an ISIS terrorist practice safe sex?
A. He marks the camels that kick.