Worst Jokes Ever
What is red, white, and goes round and round?
A baby in a blender.
What's even funnier than throwing a baby off a building?
Catching it with a pitchfork.
What did the cow say every morning?
Good moorning!
Question: Why don't cannibals eat clowns?
Answer: Because they taste funny!
My grandpa died in 9/11. I was told his last words were "Allahu Akbar."
Two hunters are walking in the forest together. Hunter #2 flops down, unconscious, and Hunter #1 dials 911.
Operator: "911, what's your emergency?"
Hunter no. 1: "The other hunter, hunting with me in the woods, fell asleep."
Operator: "Check if he's/she's (not assuming genders) dead."
*Operator hears a distant gunshot*
Hunter no. 1: "What do I do next?"
I was remembering the time when I lost my brother, only until I heard that hide and seek wasn't the best idea, especially in a secluded parking lot in downtown.
What does a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common?
By the time you're done with the breasts and the thighs, all you have left is the greasy box to put your bone in.
What is a chicken's favorite day of the week? Fri-day.
"You gotta bleed before you teeth."
- Santa Claus
It's not my fault my cousin's hot ;) YEE YEE
We should stop taking the piss out of Asian people. I mean, they already have enough on their plates... like cats and dogs.
What does a kid with cancer and a house fly have in common?
A life expectancy of 15-25 days.
Why did the shark fisherman stop at the abortion clinic?
Because dead babies make the best cum.
What do you call a man with no legs?
Neil (kneel)
I was eating this girl out the other night, and I tasted horse semen, so I said to her, "Oh, that's how you died, grandma!"
What's about 12 inches long, has a purple head, and can make women scream all night?
Cot death.
Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I have a gun,
GET IN THE VAN!!
People say rape is bad. It is because I don't want STD and HIV.
Ex Of Johnnys: I have a question.
Johnny: What?
Ex Of Johnnys: Am I pretty?
Johnny: Yes ofc jesus made everybody wonderfully!
Ex: Awhh!
Johnny: But whoever made you was painting Thomas the Train while making your face.