Worst Jokes Ever
My sister said that I need to stop with the audited butt:
I got it from her when I was born.
What is the difference between a frog and a trombone player?
The frog might be on his way to a gig!
Why did the ocean wave?
It wanted to say "Hi Tide."
Terrorist: We can go over it, we can’t go under it, let’s go through it.
There were 3 blonde scientists...wait that’s not the joke. The first one said “we are going to pilot the first unmanned spacecraft to land on the sun.”
The second one said “but we can’t do that - if we get within 5 feet of the sun we’ll freeze to death!”
The third blonde says “so we go at night.”
Yo mama so fat when I pushed her into the jacuzzi, it caused a level 8 tsunami.
What candy loves shooting stars? Starbursts!
How did Helen Keller's parents punish her?
They told her to go find the light.
Why should you never talk to pie at a party? Because it goes on forever.
Yo mama so fat, the Egyptians modeled the pyramids based on her.
So, as a school shooter, I try to remember my ABC's. A, B, C, D, E, F, GUN!
And I basically stop at G, since no students ever speak to me about the rest.
Your forehead so big it's got its own gravitational pull.
We just found out Grandpa is addicted to Viagra. No one is taking it harder than Grandma.
Why were the Twin Towers upset? Because they ordered pepperoni, yet plane arrived!!!
B: Can you please stop roasting me?
A: At least the "roasting" that I did to you didn't burn you to death.
Do you know why the cake doesn't ever fight anyone?
He says, "Take a peace of that!" while entering a fight.
You call it turds.
I call it the forbidden chocolate.
What's the difference between a drug dealer and a prostitute?
A prostitute can wash its crack and sell it again.
Period blood is like KFC, because it's finger-licking good!
What do you call a kid with special needs with a gun? Special Forces.