Worst Jokes Ever
Why did the orphan go to church?
So that they had someone to call father.
Think about you are so fucking high that you are walking to a lift and inside the lift are stairs. 🤣🤣🤣🤣
Me: Help, I'm stuck in a trap.
Friend: What kind?
Me: It's called life. Yeah, I've been trying to get out of it for six years now, it just won't let me go.
Friend: That's not funny..
Me: Yeah? Nor is wanting to die, yet I'm still over here laughing every time I try to.
Friend: I'm calling your mom.
Me: She knows.
Friend: What's she doing to help, then?
Me: She's supposed to help?
Friend: Have you told your dad?
Me: I will when he comes back.
Friend: Where is he?
Me: I don't know, he's been gone for 15 years.
Friend: ....
Me: What?
Friend: Why?
Me: Why what?
Friend: Why would you joke like that?
Me: I was joking..
Friend: I know.
Me: Oh. I didn't know.
Friend:...
Me: Have a nice day, I'll see you tomorrow... Maybe...
Knock knock.
Who's there? Discord server.
Discord server who?
This server is dead, bye bitches, I got better things to do than watch you sit here and type like a sloth.
Did you hear about the actor who fell through the floorboard?
Don't worry, he was just going through a stage.
What is Michael Jordan's favorite coffee place? Dunkin' Donuts.
What did Santa say when he got to the club? Ho, ho, ho!
Where did Sally go during the bombing? Everywhere.
Q. What color were Mohammed Atta’s eyes?
A. Blue, one blue this way and one blue the other way.
What’s the difference between cereal and a baby?
I personally think cereal is not nutritious.
Just walked in on my parents doing it! Worst 30 minutes of my life.
What do you call a man with no body and no nose?
Nobody knows.
Potatoes
What happens when you get a virus-related sickness? It goes viral on Twitter!
An Irishman walked past a bar.
My girlfriend accused me of cheating. I told her she was starting to sound like my other girlfriend.
Why did the toad cross the road?
To show his girlfriend he had guts.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 victims: they went through a hundred stories in 10 seconds.
What goes in hard but comes out soft?
Gum.
Why did the man put himself on fire?
To BURN Calories.