Worst Jokes Ever
My sister reminds me of 911: one moan of "OMG" got everyone's attention.
What do you call a crazy computer?
Wired.
What's green and sings?
Elvis Parsley!
Why are birds good at social media?
Because they "tweet" all the time!?
What is the capital of Greece? -- About 10 dollars.
I only listen to waltz 3/4 of the time.
Did you know that graveyards are the most popular place in the world?
Yeah, people are just DYING to get in there...
I just got a job at the prison library.
It has its prose and cons.
Wanna know how I got away from Iraq? Iran.
How do you stop a skunk from smelling?
Hold its nose.
Worst joke ever.
I can't believe I got fired at the calendar factory. I mean... all I did was take a day off!
My boss said she would've loved to meet Bill Cosby as a child. I don't get why I'm getting arrested. I was just making sure his dream came true.
What falls to the ground first if an apple and an emo kid fall from a tree?
The apple because the rope caught the emo kid.
What do you call a stripper in a wheelchair?
Hot wheels.
The people at 9/11 must have been able to read fast. If I explain it, it won't be funny. This is an old joke my friend told me.
Three nuns are having a charity in front of the church.
A man in a trench coat walks up and flashes the three nuns. The first nun had a stroke, the second nun had a stroke, but the third nun, her arm was too short.
What did the pilots say before crashing into the Twin Towers?
"We can't go over it, we can't go under it, we go through it!"
Have you heard of Imagine Dragons (the band)? Imagine dragging these nuts across your face.
I was working for Space X. I was instructed to control a satellite's orbit rotation when suddenly the screen went black. I investigated and found out one of Penaldos penalty had hit and destroyed the satellite. Shame on you Penaldo for ruining my dream job!
You looking for jokes? I have one: your life.