Worst Jokes Ever

Worst Jokes Ever

What do they use in communion when they run out of bread?

Doughnuts, because they're holy.

Roast

I'd say you were the spawn of Satan, but that would be an insult to Satan.

Moan moan moan moan and I moan more moan again moan moan and again and ×1000000.

Why is your forehead so shiny? Did somebody laminate you? You're so shiny, Mulan can look into your forehead and sing "Reflection."

Hey guys, it's Gwen, and I want to say that I'm deleting my account regarding a comment made on my last post :(

You: What do you call a door knob without the lock?

Me: I don't know.

You: Are you sure?

Me: I don't know.

You: Okay.

The man was Indian. He moved to England because he wanted to learn, so got a job at the store. He learned how to say "register," then he was a business man. He learned how to say "59887," then "restaurant," so he learned how to say "fork and knives." So a man came with a knife. The cop came and asked the man which was the killer who killed him. He said, "Him," and pointed to the Indian man. The cop asked, "What did you use?" He said, "Register." The cop asked for ID. "59887." The cop asked, "Anything on you, forks and knife?" He said, "Me me me."

If the genie from Aladdin was here, my three wishes would be for you to die, your kids to have a miserable life, and for everyone you love to die.

We were so poor my dad would give me a penny not to eat supper.

I'd put it under my pillow and while I was sleeping, he would come in and take it. In the morning, he would holler at me for losing the penny.

Why did my mother buy me a Honda? She knows I can't move, so she pushed my wheelchair with me in it into the ocean. I survived just by a second, but a shark got my wheelchair, fucking bitch.