If a crippled man told stories about himself, would that be called VeggieTales?
I told my friend ten puns to see what one made him laugh. No pun in ten did
I told kids to make a family tree. God, I love working at the orphanages.
I got a orphan a Iphone 6 I told him to press the home button he has been doing it all day
My girlfriend told me she was leaving me because I keep pretending to be a Transformer. I said, "No, wait! I can change."
My black friend told me to stop making racist jokes... ...I told him to lighten up.
What do you say to a women with two black eyes?
Nothing, you've told her twice.
My blind friend is so annoying, he kept bumping into things even though I repletedly told him to look where he was going
I asked my midget neighbour if he wanted a lift. He told m to "Fuck of!!!"! I thought what a cheeky cunt and zipped my backpack up and walked away.
People always told that if you killed a murderer that there would be the same number of murderers. Why stop at one?
My wife told me to be more in touch with my feminine side so i crashed the car.
my friend was on wheelchair......he committed suicide yesterday, I remember when i met him last time he told us a good joke and i appreciated him and i told him to become stand up comedian.
The orphan was playing baseball, he hit a home run. His coach told him to run home. He couldn't find it.
My sisters name is coco and one day she was funny so I told her you
Coconut
My teacher walked up to the emo kid and told him, "I like ur striped red and tan gloves" and she asked "where did you get them?" The emo kid replied, "oh I made the red stripes myself"
I told a kid his dad I's a magician because he disappeared and never came back home
I was beefin wit a dude and a wheel chair so I took his wheel chair and threw it across the street and told him walk it off u will be fine
Tombstone engraving: I TOLD you I was sick!
Me walking in to the office: Principle: tell me what u did? Me: I told the special ed kid that the 4th story window was a end portal....
How did Hellen Keller’s parents punish her? They handed her a basketball as told her to “read this book”.
