Toilet Paper

Toilet Paper jokes

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A sailor drops anchor in a port and heads into the nearest pub. Everyone in the pub is whispering and pointing at him because of his odd shaped body; he has a very muscular body, but a very tiny head on his shoulders.

As he orders his drink, he tells the bartender, "I'll explain. I get this in every port and town I visit. I caught a mermaid and she granted me three wishes if I would release her back into the sea. So I told her I wanted a yacht and, sure enough, she came through for me. Next, I asked for a million bucks and now I am set for life. Last of all, I asked her if I could have sex with her and her response was, 'I don't know how you can make love to me with your type of body.' So I asked her, 'How about a little head?'"

  • 4

    • What did the toilet paper say to the other toilet paper?

    "Hey, check me out! I'm on a roll!" 😂😂🤭🤭

    Only really smart people will get this without it being explained.

    Toilet paper fight hat.

    What did the store manager say when they ran out of toilet paper?

    We’re wiped out!

    My sister just sits on the toilet with her iPad, then I go to do something at the sink and she says, "Bella, give me toilet paper!" Then I am annoyed, like super annoyed.

    You dropped your toilet paper, right? You want to pick it up, but you can't because you have poop in your butt and it scwoshd! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

    What did the toilet paper say when he got stuck in a crack on the side walk?

    "I got stuck in a butt crack!"

    Hi 👋 I have some good ideas 💡. It was the best game I had to get in my...

    Life is like a roll of toilet paper. The closer you get to the end, the faster it goes, and everyone is trying to shit on ya.

    I figured out why everyone is buying toilet paper. Because a huge rock is headed towards Earth, and paper covers rock.

  • 0

    • We hired this boy to pick up dog poop. We just remembered that we don't have a dog.

    What does the starship Enterprise & toilet paper have in common?

    Answer: They both circle Ur-Anus looking for Kling-Ons!

    How come the toilet paper could not make it across the road?

    Because of the Corona Virus.

    Why can't the toilet paper be cheeky?

    It's between cheeks at the moment.

    Did you know toilets, while you're at work, eat your toilet paper?