I think there will be many more jokes afoot! 👣
A teacher asks a boy in her class, "If 3 birds are sitting on a fence, and one is shot, how many are left?" The boy responds with, "None." The teacher asks why. "They would all fly away after hearing the gunshot." The teacher says, "The answer is 2, but I like the way you think."
Later, the boy asks the teacher, "3 women walk out of an ice cream shop. One is eating with a spoon, one is licking it, and one is sucking it. Which one is married?" The teacher says, "The one sucking it." The boy says, "No, the one wearing the ring, but I like the way you think."
A person went to tell a joke: Knock knock! Who’s there? I don’t remember! (I think we need to moove on to the next joke now) I just now made this one up! Then I realized it is in the cow category, so I added the moove on part! 😂
Why don’t mountains 🏔 take anything serious?
Because they think they’re hill areas! 😂
I tried my best to think of some puns, but I'm gonna have tibia honest: I don't have any puns left, but I'm pretty sternum, so I'll think of a few puns here and there. It took a lot of spine ro do this.
I had a glass of Schweppes lemonade in one hand and a glass of R Whites in the other..I got into a hot sweat I think I have Corona Virus
Who thinks that dogs 🐕 bark to munch
My Cat sleeps about 20 hours a day. She has her food prepared for her. She can eat whenever she wants, 24/7/365. Her meals are provided at no cost to her. She visits the Dr. once a year for her checkup, and again during the year if any medical needs arise. For this she pays nothing, and nothing is required of her. She lives in a nice neighborhood in a house that is much larger than she needs, but she is not required to do any upkeep. If she makes a mess, someone else cleans it up. She has her choice of luxurious places to sleep. She receives these accommodations absolutely free. She is living like a queen, and has absolutely no expenses whatsoever. All of her costs are picked up by others who go out and earn a living every day. I was just thinking about all this, and suddenly it hit me like a brick in the head, Holy Sh*t, my Cat is a Democrat!
What time do you think 🤔 dogs 🐶 are not happy 😆? Bulldogs
I think that church is super burning 🥵
I think that church ⛪️ is boring
Why do people think that monsters are scary? Cuz they are so stupid
Q. What do you call a goose that thinks he's a goat?
A. A Billy Goose
jesus told me if I believed I would live for eternity. I believed but at 97 I died...
I think jesus is broken
Most annoying thing... When we send something in What's app thinking our friend is online but can only see two grey ticks...
9/11 happened...right? The cops respond to 9-1-1... coincidence, I think not.
Teacher: Who here has thought about committing suicide?
Half of the class: *raises hand*
Teacher: ...
The half of the class: *Starts talking about how they were thinking of doing it*
McDonald's was originally called 'Mac and Dick', so, if you think about it, you could be enjoying a Big Dick instead of a Big Mac.
Son: Dad am I adopted? Father: What? No! Out of all the kids in the adoption center do you really think I would pick u?
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He’s not breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls 911.
“I think my friend is dead!” he yells. “What can I do?”
The operator says, “Calm down. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.”
There’s a silence, then a shot. Back on the phone, the guy says, “OK, now what?”
