Thing jokes
Why did the 2 4s skip lunch? They already 8! Jahshshs.
And how did the pirate know that she saw land? She was shore of it! If u get it leave a like. Hahahahaha and which thing was heavier, a feather or steal? It's they way the same amount 🤣 😂 😅 😆 🙃 😄 🤣 😂 😅 😆 🙃 😄 🤣 😂 😅 😆 Lol like
Every time I come straight home from work, you're in the bed asleep and back there dead like a vampire in a casket.
Then the next thing I noticed, you just came back from the dead in no time, dummy.
Prince will be coming back in 10 mins here is a joke.
Gwen: Prince sorry but I'm wanting someone else instead. You've just been a complete jackass toward me, sorry good night.
Prince: Please!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gwen: Good night!
Prince: Why?
Gwen: Because...now good night!
Prince: We can work some things out?
Gwen: Nope...NOW GOOD NIGHT!!!!!!!!
To be continued
What's the best thing about taking a shower with a 12 year old Philippino girl?
If you slick her hair back, she looks 10.
The last thing I said to my dog was,
"Play dead."
How did people bully Helen Keller? They said, "Wow, that was the coolest thing ever! You really should have seen it!"
Q: What was the last thing the United Healthcare CEO heard before he got shot?
A: "It's me, Luigi!"
A lot of things changed when I got my girlfriend pregnant: my name, my address, and my phone number.
Jack and Jill went up my ass to eat a big dildo, but Jack died cause he got hit by a brown thing.
Knock knock.
Who's there? Discord server.
Discord server who?
This server is dead, bye bitches, I got better things to do than watch you sit here and type like a sloth.
"If you yeet one thing that has been yoted, the yeet gods will help you" - Chris Tyson, MrBeast's friend, and your mom >:)
"Does this make any cents?" a man says.
"Oh, it does make cents," me. <-- thing: Lemin"aid" <-- another joke.
Would you rather listen to Justin Bieber or die in the slowest and most painful way possible?
They're the same thing.
What is the most annoying thing your parents say to you, and what is the dumbest thing someone can say that annoys you?
The most annoying thing your parents can say: "Finish your dinner, there are starving kids in Africa!" No, you can't have any dessert until you finish your dinner. (See how annoying that is!)
The dumbest thing someone can say that annoys you: "Why is your name Crayla? Why is your last name Goldburg? Is it like a gold bird!" (That is really annoying if you ask me!)
Thanks for reading this...bye!
Been single for a couple of years and then I met this Muslim girl. She soon put the spark back into things.
Why do men say funny things? Just to be silly!
If a black person calls you a cracker, let them say it. You can say things they can't say, like, "Thanks for the warning, officer!"
They say that bad things happen to good people.
So if you get run over by a car just know you're a good person.
What’s the worst thing about having a daughter with cancer? You can’t pull on her hair.
Every time I work late at the hospital, I help the patients sleep.
There isn't a snooze button on the beeping things, so I unplug them.