They jokes
Why couldn't the orphan use the swing? Because they had no arms.
What do children and lights have in common? They both hang from ceilings!
Not funny, here’s another.
Why can’t China play baseball? They ate the bat.
I was at a friend's place yesterday, and... There was a mother, father, three sons, and a daughter.
That night the mother and father started fucking each other. I yelled and told them there are innocent children in this house.
An hour later, they started up again. I walked to their room and they were asleep, so I looked in the brothers' room and all three brothers were fucking the sister.
I sighed at this. "Incest aside, you guys make a cute family." I started, "So Anna, when am I gonna have nieces and nephews?" They stopped instantly and went to sleep. "Thank you," I replied before walking back to my room they let me sleep in and I passed out for the rest of the night.
My Countryhumans OC, Sahara, is the daughter of France and Soviet. When people ask why, I tell them it was the gendersnapped version of my parents making me. France (my dad) was drunk and Soviet (my mom) was being horny. Then they judge me, so I judge them with a knife to the chest 47 times.
Why can't orphans play at a McDonald's play place? They don't have parent supervision.
They say that "The way to a man's heart is through his stomach," but I find it a lot easier to go through the ribcage.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? Because they can’t go home.
How did they figure out what kind of shampoo Paul Walker used? They found his “head and shoulders” in the dash.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They can never find home.
Why did the carrots laugh?
They saw Mrs. Green Pea over the fence.
Why don’t orphans work as computer repair technicians? Because they can’t find the motherboard.
Three blondes were taking a walk when they stumbled on some tracks. They argued on what the tracks came from. One of them said, "it's a deer." The other said, "No it's a coyote." The last one was going to give her thoughts, but that was when the train hit them.
Why can't orphans play baseball? Because they have no home.
Why can't an orphan have sex?
Because they can't call them "daddy."
The only time rape jokes are okay; is when they aren't forced.
A married couple are on holiday in Italia. They look at the Leaning Tower of Pisa. He says: - Look, honey, this tower is crookedly standing! She: - Shut up!
(Standing means: penis erection)
This kid was going to sleep and he said, "Night, Mum. Night, Dad. And night, Grandma, and bye, Grandpa." The next morning, Grandpa died, and the next night he said, "Night, Dad. Night, Mum. Night, Grandma." Grandma died the next morning. The next night he said, "Night, Mum, bye, Dad," and they heard the postman died because he was the dad, lol.
Why is it so easy to bully an orphan? What are they gonna do, tell their mum?
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they can’t run home.
How many squirrels does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Two, but how they got in there's the real mystery!