They jokes
Why can't orphans never run all the bases in baseball? Because they can never make it home.
Why can’t orphans have a computer?
Because they don’t have a home page.
Why should China be a baseball team?
Because they can take out the entire world with just one bat!
What does a baby and a grenade have in common?
They both make a noise when you throw them.
Why are Americans bad at chess?
Because they lost two towers.
Sorry man, but I got to say one thing. You know when a bully in a movie walks to you, then they walk up to you, and they smell you and say, "What are you doing?"
I saw a kid crying. I asked him what's wrong, where are your parents? They paused and looked at me funny... GOD I LOVE WORKING AT AN ORPHANAGE.
A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar.
They should have ducked.
Q: How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? A: They put a plunger in the toilet.
Q: How many kids did Helen Keller have? A: None, the plunger went all the way up.
One day, a priest is walking down the street and sees a little girl with a box. "What's in the box?" the priest asks. "Christian kittens," the little girl answers.
Pleased, the priest smiles and continues on his way.
A week later, the same priest is walking down the street with a nun when he sees the little girl and the box again. "Ask her what she has in the box," he says, "It's the cutest thing!"
The nun walks up and asks the girl what she has in the box. "Atheist kittens," she says.
The priest rushes forward and says, "ATHEIST KITTENS!!! Last week you said they were 'Christian kittens!!!'"
"They were," she says. "Now their eyes are open."
Why do dwarfs laugh when they run?
Because the grass tickles their balls.
Why can’t orphans have a good childhood?
Because they could not go to theme parks! 😅😅
Remember kids if ur ever mad beat up an orphan what are they gonna do call their mom??
A woman goes into labor with her child. The doctor says that they have invented a new device to transfer the pain of childbirth to the father. He asks if it is ok to use the new device. The couple agrees, and so he turns the pain to the father to 10%. The man feels nothing.
They then bump it up to 20%. He still feels nothing, then his friend calls and he is groaning. He said he was having cramps, so the husband tells the doctor, "Doc, turn it up to 40%!" So he does, and his friend throws up, so he said, "Doc, turn it up to 100%!" and his friend dies.
They found out that Michael Jackson was transgender, he went from he/him to hee-hee.
9/11 victims are the best readers.
They went through hundreds of stories in a few seconds.
Orphan: Where are my parents?
God: New York City.
Orphan: But they used to live in China.
Brian has a crush on a cute girl, Sally, from school, so he goes and tells his dad about her, and he says, "Sorry, son, you can't like her; she is your sister." So Brian is okay with it, and he starts to like another girl, Madison, and he goes up to his dad and says, "I have a crush on this girl, Madison," and again the dad goes, "Oh, sorry, son, you can't like any girl in school; they are all your sisters." So he goes crying to his mom and says, "Dad said I can't like any girl because they are all my sisters," and the mom goes, "Oh, it's okay; you can like any girl you want because he is not your dad."
Why don't witches wear underwear?
So they can get a better grip on their broom.
Why is a sick person and California similar? They tend to burn up.