Thereness jokes
Yo mama so fat that when God said, "Let there be light," he asked her to move out the way.
I rate the atmosphere of Israel a 10/7; real good stuff there, looks like an actual movie!
In the heart of a circular, creamy delight, there exists a void, a singular absence that adds to its charm. This hollow space, a perfect round, is a testament to the artistry of nature and man's culinary skills.
The hole, a silent observer, bears witness to the transformation of the substance around it, from a liquid state to a firm, yet supple form. It's a silent testament to the passage of time, a symbol of patience and the magic of fermentation.
The void, despite its emptiness, contributes to the overall aesthetic, making the slice a visual treat. It's a playful peek-a-boo with the world beyond, a window that adds mystery and intrigue.
In the end, the hole is not just a void, but a character in the story of this culinary masterpiece, a silent protagonist that adds depth and character to the narrative. It's a testament to the beauty of imperfection, a celebration of the unique and the unconventional.
Kid: Mum, how do you know someone is drunk?
Mum: See the four birds over there?
Kid: Huh, wait a minute.
Mum: A drunk person would see eight.
Kid: Mum, but there is only two.
Why isn’t there a pregnant Barbie doll?
Ken came in a different box.
There's nothing stronger than love, except for an M32 Rotary Grenade Launcher because fuck you and everyone near you.
I'm Asian and there is a saying that dogs are man's best friends. They are my best friends because they keep me from starving.
Today on a drive, I decided to go visit my childhood home. I asked the people living there if I could come inside because I was feeling nostalgic, but they refused and slammed the door in my face.
My parents are the worst.
I told my friend that there was a tree. On that tree, there were four black chickens. I asked how many beaks do the chickens have. He said four.
Then I said there was a white cat. How many teeth does it have? He couldn't answer, so I said, "Looks like you know more about black cocks than white pussy."
There are 206 bones in my body.
When I look at you, it becomes 207.
Imagine there’s a funny joke here. Imagine it? Great! Now check yourself into an insane asylum because you’re schizophrenic.
Imagine there's a funny joke here... imagined it? Great! Now check yourself into an insane asylum because you're schizophrenic.
Asian pregnancy test:
Stick a Rubix cube into pussy.
Wait 30 seconds, if it's solved then there's a little Asian in there.
If you can make a woman laugh, you're almost there.
If you're almost there and then she laughs, then you've got a whole different problem on your hands.
Knock, knock.
"Who's there?"
Not your dad.
Knock, knock.
(Who’s there?)
It’s the police, ma’am, your son got hit by a drunken driver. He’s dead.
Do you know why there are no pharmacies and pharmacists in Africa?
Because you can't take pills on an empty stomach!
There was a kid crying. I asked him where his parents were. He cried more. Orphanages are really fun to work at.
"A dyslexic atheist lies awake at night wondering if there really is a Dog."
A guy is sitting at home when he hears a knock at the door. He opens the door and sees a snail on the porch. He picks up the snail and throws it as far as he can.
Three years later there’s a knock on the door. He opens it and sees the same snail. The snail says: “What the hell was that all about?”