Them jokes

Scooter

The sad thing is when they ride the scooters in Wal-Mart... Really, you declining to walk is what got your fat ass in that scooter to begin with... And damned if they aren't buying diet soda... Please... cull this shit... We don't need them in society... KFC is not a disease.

Funeral

When my family goes to weddings, my senior relatives tell me things like “You’re next!” So I started doing the same to them at funerals.

Wheelchair

Do you know why people in wheelchairs don’t pay for them?

Because they have to pay for road tax.

Orphan

Orphans actually have an advantage. Nobody can call them motherless or test-tube babies in an argument.

Orphanage

On April Fool's, go to an orphanage and tell them that their parents are here to pick them up.

Dad

My jokes are like your dad, you only see them for a few days.

Orphan

Why do orphans die when a tornado comes?

They don't have parents to protect them.

Wish

Three men were lost in the desert and found a genie who granted each of them a wish.

The 1st man wished he was home with his family. The 2nd man wished he was home with his family, and the 3rd man wished they were all back together again.

Friend

What's the best way to tell your friend you hate them? Option 1: Kill them. Option 2: Walk away. Option 3: Kill each other.

Me: Why can't I just kms and leave them the pain?

Orphan

How do you make an orphan's hands bleed?

You tell them to clap until their parents come back.

Argument

How do you win an argument against an emo kid?

Kick the chair out from under them.

Nugget

Why did McDonald’s kill somebody because they stole the 12-piece nuggets that will never be seen because of them!