Somebody stole my joke
So i stole their spinal cord.
I refuse to believe my dad got fired as a road worker for theft. But when I came home there were signs everywhere
To whomever stole my anti-depression pills, I hope your happy now
i thought i told u the lock up when i left this morning this is why our shit gets stolen all the time
in the new grinch the whos would say he stole christmest get him then the grinch said im a orphan that changes everything the whos said what would they do if max was a orphan
A kid named billy get his lunch money stolen at school. The bully later gets his allowance, the lunch money and his wallet taken by his father. The father then gets all the money taken from his by the bully’s grandfather along with is own wallet. The grandfather then takes the money and gets it stolen by billy along with his own wallet.
Why did the vegetable go to jail? He kaled a man and stole a 9 carrot gold bar.
Jack and Jill went up the hill both had Bacardi rum, when Jill's was gone she wanted Jacks that's why she took it from him
I never wanted to believe that my Dad was stealing from his job as a road worker.
But when I got home, all the signs were there.
How do you know if an Asian has broke into your house? Your dog is gone. ;)
Last time I got caught stealing a calendar I got 12 months.
Bank owner:if you want to start a bank account, I need ur name. Guy:Robin Bank owner: ur last name? Guy:Debank Bank owner: Robin Debank? Guy: put your hands up and give me all the money!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Your so poor people break into your house and leave things
The bakery where I work is being robbed I said to the people I am calling the police then I realized they did not come for the money they came for the bread. Huh go figure.
If you had 10 chicken nuggets and Jimmy tried to steal one, what would you have?
10 chicken nuggets and a dead Jimmy.
What did Julius say when he saw a woman stealing an expensive chandelier?
“Guards! Seize her (Caesar)!”
I's so poor that I had to rob a food bank for a loaf of bread.
To the man in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket: you can hide, but you can’t run
Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson decide to go on a camping trip. After dinner and a bottle of wine, they lay down for the night, and go to sleep.
Some hours later, Holmes awoke and nudged his faithful friend.
"Watson, look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
Watson replied, "I see millions of stars."
"What does that tell you?"
Watson pondered for a minute.
"Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets." "Astrologically, I observe that Saturn is in Leo." "Horologically, I deduce that the time is approximately a quarter past three." "Theologically, I can see that God is all powerful and that we are small and insignificant." "Meteorologically, I suspect that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow." "What does it tell you, Holmes?"
Holmes was silent for a minute, then spoke: "Watson, you idiot. Someone has stolen our tent!"
When you steal the weird pet rock so he pulls out his pet glock
