The jokes

Why did the girl study in the tree? She wanted a higher education.

What do Princess Diana and a landmine have in common? Both are easy to lay. Both costly and time-consuming to get rid of.

What did Saint Peter say to Diana when she got to the pearly gates? "Wipe that Merc off your face."

When you're the only one bullying the weird kid and you're absent on the day he shoots up the school. ̄\_(ツ)_/ ̄

Two nuts were chasing each other. One said to the other, "I'm-a cashew!"

What’s the best way to get a baby out of a blender? Tortilla Chips.

What’s the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?

A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

9/11 wasn’t a terrorist attack, it was the world’s introduction to Sky Football

What's the most played game in Africa? The Hunger Games.

Surprise sex is the best thing to wake up to.

Unless you are in prison.

A man got fired from the first coin factory. He exclaimed, "No! This is the only thing that's ever made cents!"

Why did the farmer go to the strip club?

Because he was looking for his hoe.

Why did the cow not want to talk to the other cow? Because they had beef with each other.

1 and 2 fell in love. The 2 said, "You're the only 1 for me!"

What did the two paintings say after a long battle?

Let's call this one a draw.

Wanted to get the scoop on history of ice cream, so I went to Sunday school.

I was wondering why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.

What would you call the Eiffel Tower if it falls over? The I Fell Tower!

What road goes all the way to the sky? A highway.

Why did the tornado take a break?

Because it ran out of wind! 😂

What is the difference between a Taliban outpost and a Pakistani primary school?

I don't know... I just fly the drone.