The jokes
Your mom is so weak, when she jumped from the Twin Towers, her baby became disabled.
What movie do orphans relate to the most?
"Spider-Man: No Way Home." (Either that or Batman.)
Why did the skeleton go to the movies by himself?
He had no body to go with.
Why did the bike fall over?
Because it was two tired!
Runescape is the only form of birth control that is 100% effective.
Why was the whale sad?
Because he is blue!
Why did the guy get the hose?
Because the girl was smoking hot.
Why did the bike fall over?
It was too tired.
What’s the difference between a teenage girl and a cat? One’s a psycho and the other is a cat.
What was the last thing that went through JFK's mind? A bullet.
I was riding my bike down the road!
When a car started coming, I started running.
It put me in a crash with my elbow through my ass! ;)
Stupid joke about Stephen Hawking that wasn't funny the first fucking time.
What did the people who cracked the Liberty Bell get for breaking it?
The no-bell prize.
His wife shut off the internet.
What did the boyfriend say to his girlfriend?
Why does the sun get a lot of girls? Because it's hot.
What's the difference between the microphone and Bambi?
One is a Welsh idea, the other's a well shy deer.
Why did the camel cross the road?
Because it wanted to get to the bright green grass.
Two pencils walking down the street.
Which one hasn’t got AIDS?
The one with the rubber on.
One day, this dad and his son went to a basketball factory, and the son said, "I want to buy some balls." The dad said, "What for?" The son said, "So you can have some balls."