The jokes

Homicide

"Ahoy, Spongebob! I just committed homicide in Syria, and the one-party state is after my fucking ass! Argagagagagaga!"

Trash

I went to take out the trash, could not find you, so I went back in. The next day I found you.

Man

A man is about to be hanged. His executioner asks for his last words.

The man says, “Man, it’s hard to think of something when your life is on the line.”

Dad

What's the difference between when I opened the window in a car wash and when Kawhi Leonard did it? At least my dad didn't get shot in the eye.

Billboard

What stands on the side of the road and needs a lot of money to buy?

Billboard, did you think I was gonna say street walker?

Coal

What do people get for Christmas when they behave badly? They get coal. Why coal, you're probably saying, because the true meaning is cucks of all kinds.

Air

Huh, I’m pregnant again. Must be something in the air.

Yeah, your legs.

Woman

What does a beaten woman do when she comes home from the hospital?

Dishes if she knows what's good for her health.

Naruto

Beating the Akatsuki is easy... Naruto should've used painkillers instead. :)

Home

A cartoonist was found dead in his home.

The details are SKETCHY! :)