The jokes
Why was Goofy in the bathroom?
He was goofing off!
If the shoe doesn't fit, there's no evidence.
Which room is the safest place in the house?
The living room.
Why is the elephant headed God the true God?
Because he doesn't exist!
Even the Twin Towers got a better upgrade than your ugly ass.
Memes
What is the same thing between water and dark jokes?
Not everyone gets it!
Why did the booger cross the nose?
Answer: To get to the other hole.
The Philthydelphia Eagles.
That's it. That's the joke.
The Eagles when they actually thought they were gonna win the Super Bowl. 😹
Why did the chicken cross the road?
It felt like it.
There was a guy who got his whole left side shot off.
When he was at the hospital and he woke up, he asked the doctor if he was okay.
The doctor said, "You're all right now."
What is a Fortnite player's favorite football team? The rabbit raiders! LOL! LMAO! LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL! LMAO! 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀
Why did the chicken cross the road?
To become the spicy chicken burger at Chic-fil-A.
The Emo kid was late to his flight, so he needed to cut to the chase.
The doctor said I have until 2:30 to live.
That’s like 20 years from now, I said.
He looks at the time. It’s 2:30.
What is the difference between an Apple and an orphan?
The apples get picked.
Why do orphans like cows?
Because when they leave, they bring back the milk.
Little off topic but...
Mum: You wouldn't be here without me.
Son: And my birth certificate is a sorry letter from the condom factory.
Mum: Fair point.
The existence of the word "priest" implies the existence of "prier" and "pri".
I went to the zoo the other day and it only had one dog... yeah, it was a shih tzu.