The jokes

Why do orphans watch "The Nightmare Before Christmas"?

Answer: Oogie Boogie is ugly, so they want to be ugly.

I thought I had the best K/D ratio in my fighter jet on Battlefield, then I heard about Mohammed Atta.

I asked the emo at my school if he got jealous when his phone died.

The Stephen Hawking space telescope will be launched next year. Apparently, it will have four wheels and run off Windows 7.

What's the difference between a goat and a sex slave?

I don't have a slave in my sex dungeon.

What makes piracy and anti-piracy so unique?

One isn't that of a thief, while the other is as serious as fuck.

The thing about 9/11 and the jokes about it, for most people it flew over their head, for some it flew into their head.

What's the difference between a piano, a pot of glue, and a tuna fish?

You can tuna piano, but you can't piano a tuna.

What about the glue?

I knew you'd get stuck there.

Your momma so fat she can feed [the] entire continent of Africa with her fat!

"Nancy be like I sucked my way to the top."

Lol, the Twin Towers ordered a drop in from Pizza Hut, but instead they got a hot and ready from Jet's.

Well, I got stuck in the dryer and fell asleep. Then my step bro got home, and I did not know, and hours later I woke up. My pants were down, and my butt was on fire.

What is an orphan's favorite day?

Tomorrow: that is when the sun will come out.

Why are the Twin Towers actually twins?

Their birth and death date are the same.

Your momma is so fat, she was in a movie and the screen broke!

Why couldn't the toilet paper cross the road?

'Cause it was stuck in the crack... *buttcrack*

Your mom is so small that she can fit in the luggage.

What's the difference between you and me?

I have a plan for this new year.

So long, suckers. Keep scrolling.

Why couldn't the toilet cross the road?

Answer: 'Cause it got stuck in the crack.

Y'know, I never knew Obi-Wan Kenobi participated in an anime, "Snow White with the Red Hair," up until now.