The jokes
TommyInnit said, "Long live the Queen." Look at where she's at now.
Have you heard about the Pokemon called "rhy rhy rhyde" on deez nuts?
This joke is unavailable due to the National Period of Mourning. Please return to this page on the 19th of September.
R.I.P. Queen Elizabeth II. 1926-2022.
My nan broke her toe on a brick today. Last time she broke her toe because she kicked her car tire. Does that now mean I have to tow her back to the doctors?
What’s the difference between a brick and redheads? Bricks get laid.
Where do orphans have their family reunions?
The graveyard.
Jack and Jill went up the hill, had some fun, now they have 4 babies.
What’s the difference between a kid with cancer and a dark humor joke?
They never get old.
Yo mama so stupid, she shoved two AA batteries up her ass and started singing, "I’ve Got The Power!"
I saw an orphan and I said, "Yo."
He said, "What do you want?"
I said, "To be your new father."
"Really??!" the orphan said.
Me: Lol, no.
Orphan *Jumps into street*
Deja-poo.
The sense or feeling you have dealt with this crap in the past.
How many redheads does it take to change a lightbulb?
One! She holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.
He only won the election because of rigging.
82 million votes my ass.
Ask me for proof.
Throw a plate.
It’s broken, right?
Say “sorry” to it.
Did it fix back?
No... that’s the same thing you did to me :)
Cow A: I slept with your sister!
Cow B: Never knew my brother was a girl!
All the other cows:
:O
What did the pencil say to the piece of paper? You FLAT.
What did the spoon say to the pancake batter? You THICK.
When you have to get your prostate checked and you can feel the cold rubber of the glove, but you realize both the doctor's hands are on your shoulders.
I was at a baseball game and I was wondering why the ball was coming closer.
And then it hit me.
Two hats are next to each other. One hat says to the other, "Stay here, I'll go on ahead."
What do dogs do when they lose their tail?
They go to the retail store.