Did you know that graveyards are the most popular place in the world?
Yeah, people are just DYING to get in there...
What's the most expensive haircut in the world?
Chemotherapy.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11victims, they went through 87 stories in 7seconds
How many feminists do you need to change a light bulb?
One. She puts the bulb up and waits for the world to revolve around her.
...just kidding-
- none. They can't change anything.
How is the world like dirt?
Because we don't think twice about it.
What does Germany and the rest of the world have in common? They both use gases to poison one thing or another.
What's Gru's favorite Beyoncé lyric? "Who run the world... Gorls."
A young boy enters a barber shop, and the barber whispers to his customer, "This is the dumbest kid in the world. Watch while I prove it to you."
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, "Which do you want, son?" The boy takes the quarters and leaves.
"What did I tell you?" said the barber. "That kid never learns!"
Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream parlor.
"Hey, son! May I ask you a question? Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?"
The boy licked his cone and replied:
"Because the day I take the dollar the game is over!"
What's the most horrifying video in the world?
Logan Paul vlogs.
Who’s the hottest girl in the world?
Babe Ruth cuz she catches the sun.
The gayest person in the world is Pacman. You can pay him to eat 200 balls.
Hey, did you know that Stephen Hawking predicted the end of the world?
Well, not really. He predicted the end of *his* world.
Riddle: I don't move, I travel across the world, but I never leave the corner. What am I?
Answer: A stamp.
Who are the fastest readers in the world?
9/11 Victims, they went through 89 stories in 7 seconds.
Somebody once told me the world is gonna roll me. I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed. She was looking kind of dumb with her finger and her thumb In the shape of an "L" on her forehead.
Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming. Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running. Didn't make sense not to live for fun. Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb.
So much to do, so much to see So what's wrong with taking the back streets? You'll never know if you don't go. You'll never shine if you don't glow.
[Chorus:] Hey, now, you're an All Star, get your game on, go play Hey, now, you're a Rock Star, get the show on, get paid. And all that glitters is gold Only shooting stars break the mold.
It's a cool place and they say it gets colder. You're bundled up now wait 'til you get older. But the meteor men beg to differ Judging by the hole in the satellite picture.
The ice we skate is getting pretty thin. The water's getting warm so you might as well swim. My world's on fire. How about yours? That's the way I like it and I'll never get bored.
[Chorus 2x]
Somebody once asked could I spare some change for gas. I need to get myself away from this place. I said yep, what a concept I could use a little fuel myself And we could all use a little change.
Well, the years start coming and they don't stop coming. Fed to the rules and I hit the ground running. Didn't make sense not to live for fun. Your brain gets smart but your head gets dumb.
So much to do, so much to see. So what's wrong with taking the back streets? You'll never know if you don't go. You'll never shine if you don't glow.
[Chorus]
And all that glitters is gold Only shooting stars break the mold.
What was purple and conquered the world?
Alexander The Grape.
Sonic can run around the world in a second.
In that same time, Chuck Norris can run around the Universe.
What do you do after you eat the softest pussy in the world?
Put the diapers back on.
So what if I can’t spell Armageddon? It’s not the end of the world.
There's 10 kind of people in the world. -- Those who know binary and those who don't.
