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That jokes

A brunette, a red-head, and a blonde are being chased by bandits. They are chased to the edge of a cliff and a genie appears.

"I will help you escape," says the genie, "say what you wish to turn into, and you will become that thing."

The brunette jumps off the cliff and says "Hawk." She turns into a hawk and flies away. The red-head says "Falcon." She turns into a falcon and flies away. Now the blonde is alone and the bandits are getting closer. She makes her decision and backs up, then runs toward the cliff. And...she trips and says "Crap."

The End

  • 0

    • Man, I’m so sorry that Stephen Hawking is dead; he was such a good person.

    Too bad it’s a staircase to Heaven and not a ramp.

    Your mama is so fat that when she wears yellow, kids run after her thinking they missed the school bus.

    Your mama is so stupid that when she heard drinks were on the house, she grabbed a ladder.

    You know the drill, but do you know the hammer? Hah, nailed that one.

    But I also think I screwed it up.

    My boyfriend recently asked me to suck his cock. I was kinda nervous because I’ve never tasted a dick, but he said it doesn’t taste that bad, so I’ll give it a shot.

    I have an EpiPen.

    My friend gave it to me when he was dying.

    It seemed really important to him that I have it.

  • 2

    • Two boys are talking on the bus.

    Boy 1: I feel like I'm forgetting something.

    Boy 2: Hey, did you hear about that school shooting last week?

    Boy 1: Oh, that's right.

    An American is touring the Soviet Union. A Russian takes him to a school so he can see what it's like. He asks the kids if they like the Soviet Union. All of the kids say yes, they love it. All but one. That kid bursts out crying. The American asks what's wrong, and he cries, "I want to live in the Soviet Union!"

    What do you call a duck that is addicted to drugs?

    A quack head!

    My mom must be a duck then...

    I have a penis.

    How's that for a fucking joke? It's not a joke. It's terrible.

    500 thumbs down and I'll lop off my dick with a razor.

    A thief walks up to a man in a suit and pulls out a gun. The thief says: "Give me your money." The man in the suit turns around surprised. He raises his hands and says: "But, wait! You can't do that, I am a Congressman!" The thief replies: "Oh, sorry. Give me MY money."

  • 9

    • One time I walked into a room and I saw a man and a dwarf, and I soon found out that the man was the dwarf's father, and I noticed that the dwarf really looked up to him.

    So Timmy was walking down the street with his friend Lea. Suddenly a car drives by and Timmy waves at the car.

    Lea looks at him, puzzled, then later asks him; "Why'd you wave at that car back there?"

    Timmy replies "Oh that was my brother, he went to the bar. He must just be driving home..."

    What did the cow say to the sheep?

    “Moo!”

    What did the sheep say to the cow?

    “That was a bad joke!”

    Want to hear an inside joke? I walked into a house.

    Want to hear an outside joke? I walked out of that house.