That jokes
Did you hear about the orphan that tried to high five a tree? It left her hanging.
Your hairline is so far back that it dated back to 13 BC.
Your mama is so ugly! Ghostface from Scream won't even make that call!
I went up to my mom and asked how humanity started. She said it started with monkeys, so I went up to my dad and asked. My dad said it all started with Adam and Eve, so I told my dad that mom said humanity started with monkeys, and dad said mom was telling her side of the story. LOL🤣
Pilot: This is my last flight, everyone.
Passengers: *Clap*
Pilot: I became a pilot for one reason: To conquer my greatest fear.
Flight Attendant: And what is that?
Pilot: Dying alone. *speeds up towards Twin Towers*
Also the Pilot: Now who is ready to play some Jen---
Your mama smells so bad that everytime she goes outside, she gets ticketed for pollution. She's so ugly that everytime she looks out a window, she gets arrested for mooning.
Your mama is so fat and stupid. She got hit by a school bus. Her reply was, "Who threw that Twinkie at me?"
You are so fat that the last time you stepped on the weighing scale, the doctor said, "I want your weight and not [your] phone number."
That awkward moment when a fat kid says, “That’s how I roll.”
A recent study has found that women who carry a little extra weight live longer than the men who mention it.
What do people use more than you that is yours?
What goes up but never comes down?
Oh, Lois, that was more scary than Michael Jackson without pants in front of a kid!
Chuck Norris is the only man that ever had sex with my wife and survived. Oh, how did I survive?
Fortunately, being her husband, I was the one person she wasn't fucking.
I love eating pussy. That’s why the animal shelter is always my go-to for a good meal.
I got fired from the bowling ball factory for throwing out the ones that had holes in them.
My brother goes into the bar and says, "Bartender, give me 12 beers and a shot of whiskey." The bartender says, "That's a lot of alcohol." My brother says, "I'm celebrating my first blowjob." The bartender said, "Let me buy you a drink." My brother said, "No, this should be enough to get the taste out of my mouth."
My wife is the only person that has "missing" posters attached to her ass.
I'd like to see things from your point of view, but I can't seem to get my head that far up my ass.
Just burned 2,000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap.