The only woman to ever tell you that they loved you was ur mom. (If she even loved you in the first place.)
At weddings my mom always tells me I’m next. So I say the same to her, at funerals.
POV: me telling a joke
My dad: nobody likes a smart-ass Me: nobody likes a smart-ass until the smart-ass find a cure for cancer
My teacher gave me an A in Physics that she tells me that it turns guys on .
How can you tell if a man is straight? You don't have to, he will tell you.
A priest and a rabbi were hanging out at a playground. The priest waves to a kid to come over and tells the rabbi, "Let's screw this kid." The rabbi looks confused and asks, "Out of what??"
Q: How do you turn a cat into a fish?
A: Tell the woman not to wash down there
tell an orphan ur mom but then remember he doesn't have one
id tell a joke about how my mom was abusive but i either forgot everything or she just wasn't there
Tell me a joke about my hairline no because he don't got one feel like Donald Trump it don't move
If you're ever bored, punch an orphan. What are they going to do? Tell their parents?
I would tell you an orphan joke, ehh I’ll just tell your parents instead
Ok so I have a joke for you,go look in the mirror and when you realise come back to me and tell me.
Tell someone that your gonna say “I 1 poopoo” and it will go in order of numbers, so they say, “I 2 poopoo” & so on:
You) I 1 poopoo (Them) I 2 poopoo (You) I 3 poopoo (Them ) I 4 poopoo (You)I 5 poopoo (Them) I 6 poopoo (You) I 7 poopoo (Them) I 8 poopoo (And be like, “You ate poopoo??! EWW!!”)
You know, people allways tell you to stand up for yourself. Why didn't anyone tell the world trade center that? 🤔
i told siri my dog and she told me if she could tell me a joke to cheer me up and i said okay.she asked me knock knock and i said who is there and she said not your dog
Once I asked Siri to tell me a joke and it asked me “what is the difference between a large pizza and you”one can feed a family
It funny how you feel so alone with depression and yet once you tell people on some random website so may people relate unfortunately it doesn't stop the loneliness
I saw this one quote of the people who smile the most are covering the most pain I think this is true just not with everyone. As I am really depressed and act like myself with my friends but with my parents and family I force a smile so they don't worry more than they do. I did a test for my therapy session to see what level of depression I had. It came back with severe 22/24 but I asked her to tell my mum it came back as moderate saying I would tell her that my depression got worse she went along with it but I haven't told my mum and I know make things sound like I aren't as messed up as I truly am to my therapist
You know why eggs cant tell jokes? They crack eachother up
