Technology jokes
I was doing a 10km run with my good friend Pessi. As we were setting up our smart watches, the watch voice asked us if we wanted to do a solo run or a group run.
Pessi proceeded to smash both our watches and shout, “I don’t want solo run, I want Penalty!”
Shame on you, Pessi!
Joe Mama is so fat that when she sat on an iPhone, it turned into an iPod.
I made a website for orphans.
It does not have a home page.
Why can't orphans exit out of their games? They don't have a home button.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite food? His left shoulder.
What's Stephen Hawking's favorite robot? Him as his shoulder/wheelchair.
What happens to Stephen Hawking when he logs in to his account on Google when it says, "I am not a robot?"
A normal kid brings an MP3 to school.
A rich kid brings an MP4 to school.
A quiet kid brings an MP5.
I asked the emo kid if they get jealous when their phone dies.
Do you know what the equivalent to hell is these days?
1. Listening to your teacher.
2. Not having your phone/game/TV.
3. Not having nicotine.
Pop-up. P
Man: Why can't an orphan use Verizon?
Kid: I don't know why.
Man: Because they have a family plan.
Kid: Well, I need to get another phone service now.
Why is Stephen Hawking not scared of anyone?
His wheelchair always backs him up.
They say Jesus walked on water.
That's nothing. Stephen Hawking ran on batteries.
Knock knock. Who's there? Beep boop S.t.e.p.h.e.n beep boop H.a.w.k.i.n.g.
Stephen Hawking is to wheelchairs like Uncle Ben is to rice.
Grandma isn’t responding. Close app, wait, cancel.
Which do you choose?
I built a website for an orphanage, but it had no homepage.
Do you know Stephen is dead? He doesn't have a stone. Do you know how to find him? A metal detector.
I made a website on orphans, sadly it didn't have a homepage.
How can you tell that a website was made by an orphan?
It doesn’t have a home page.