Stephen Hawking jokes
Why is he called Stephen Hawking?
Because he is always trying to hawk up phlegm to clear his throat.
Knock knock.
Who's there?
Steven.
Can't you read? It says, "No Hawking."
Did you hear about the car that turned into a wheelchair?
At least he got D.L.A. (Disability Living Allowance), so it's not all bad. Every cloud has a silver lining...even a mushroom cloud.
Knock knock. Who's there? Beep boop S.t.e.p.h.e.n beep boop H.a.w.k.i.n.g.
What was Stephen Hawking's favorite line in Rambo?
"Don't push me."
If Carlsberg did wheelchairs...
Stephen Hawking was a bit of a hardcase. He didn't let people push him around.
Stephen Hawking is to wheelchairs like Uncle Ben is to rice.
There were ten in the bed and the little one said... "Roll over..."
If Stephen Hawking was a boxer, he would roll with the punches.
For sale: Wheelchair, one careful owner, no longer needed.
I can't walk, I can't talk, but I can drive a wheelchair.
Stephen Hawking prefers rolls to slices of bread.
Could never understand why people would say Stephen Hawking is a dead man walking.
Knock knock. Who's there? Stephen Hawking. Wheelie?
What does E.T. stand for? Because he has little legs.
What does S.H. stand for? He doesn't.
What does S.H. stand for? Shit happens.
Stephen Hawking's best subjects were Physics and Maths. His worst was P.E.
What color is Stephen Hawking's house?
It's a bungalow.
Stephen Hawking was a spac. But if you put an E on the end, you get space, and he loved that.