Sports jokes
Where do you find white people on a bench?
- The NBA.
I know a girl in a wheelchair. I realize now why she couldn’t do sports because the coaches wanted 100% from her, but she was only able to give 50%.
Here's a list of puns, not all of them are mine.
1. Smaller babies may be delivered by stork, but the heavier ones need a crane.
2. Yesterday, I accidentally swallowed some food coloring. The doctor says I’m okay, but I feel like I’ve dyed a little inside.
3. My sister bet that I couldn’t build a car out of spaghetti. You should’ve seen her face when I drove pasta.
4. Getting the ability to fly would be so uplifting.
5. Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”
6. Why was the cookie sad? Because his mom was a wafer long!
7. Why didn’t the cat go to the vet? He was feline fine!
8. How do you make a good egg-roll? You push it down a hill!
9. That baseball player was such a bad sport. He stole third base and then just went home!
10. My parents said I can’t drink coffee anymore. Or else they’ll ground me!
Why can't orphans play baseball?
They don't know where home is.
Why do orphans not play baseball?
'Cause they can't find home.
Memes
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find their home base.
Q: What do the St. Louis Rams and Billy Graham have in common?
A: They both can make 70,000 people stand up and yell, “Jesus Christ.”
Why can't orphans play baseball?
Because they can't find home.
What do sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing, they fast.
I was in the corner shop to buy some lottery tickets, and the Indian woman was sporting a red dot on her forehead. I scratched it off and won a fucking Ford Focus!
I told my brother if he wanted to have a wonderful first day of school, then he should put a cookbook in the women's sports section at the school library.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
Because they don’t have a home to run to.
Why can’t orphans play baseball?
They don’t know where home plate is.
Why can’t Chinese people play baseball? Because they ate the bat.
If you don’t get it, a Chinese woman ate a bat and she got the coronavirus (I think).
What bee doesn’t fly properly?
Kobe.
Just remembering the day when the Jets beat the New York Giants.
"I'm very good in sports."
"In which sports?"
"EA Sports."
Why can't Chinese people play baseball? They always eat the bat.
What’s a Mexican's favorite sport?
Cross-country.
A boxer talks with his fists.
Stephen Hawking talks with his wheelchair.