Sports jokes
What is the difference between Nicole Brown Simpson and cancer?
OJ couldn’t kill cancer.
I heard P. Diddy got a job as a defensive coordinator.
He’s used to penetrating aggressively.
My cousin really loves baseball.
He always brags about how many home runs he hit in the minors.
Why is Donald Trump so jealous of Usain Bolt?
Because he successfully finished a race!
Calling Alabama's football team an astonishment would be the biggest understatement of the century, especially since they continuously catch balls from someone who isn't related to them.
What do you call a rapper who LOVES winter sports?
Ice Cube.
What do sexists and WNBA fans have in common?
There's enough of them to acknowledge their existence.
What’s a priest's favorite sport?
Golf, because most of the holes are less than 18.
Why don’t Indians play soccer?
Because every time they’re at the corner, they build a store.
What do Nike and the KKK have in common?
They both make Black people run faster.
What's a rapper's favorite sport?
Rhyme racing.
Why did the parachute break up with the skydiver?
Because it was tired of being taken for granted every time things fell apart.
Why don't rappers ever play baseball?
Because they're too busy dropping hits!
What’s the difference between Usain Bolt and Hitler?
Usain finished the races.
A buddy and I checked out some books from a local library. When we returned them, he said, "Your sister works the returns, right?" I told him, "Yes, she does, and she will be here in about five minutes." He said, "Why don’t we put a cookbook in the women’s sports section?" I told him, "I love it!" So I picked out a Reese Witherspoon book.
What does weed and the Carolina Panthers have in common?
They both get smoked in bowls.
Why was the rapper bad at baseball?
Because he couldn't stop DROPPING HITS.
You can find perfectly cooked Kobe in a Japanese restaurant, but you can only find burnt Kobe in Calabasas.
Yo mama is so dumb, she thought Dunkin' Donuts was a basketball team.
What's the difference between football and rape? Women don't like football.