Speech jokes
Bully: I can't understand you because I don't speak ugly language.
Me: And I don't speak idiot language.
Did you hear about the guy who made the knock-knock joke?
He won the "no bell" prize.
"Aren't you going back home now?"
"No, I am going back home."
What are the subtitles when a disabled person speaks in a movie?
nsjajahdahwggwdgdvtwqfdvgcqgvhheydgdygsydgdfydwfwdgsqgsgyd
Do you know Bumo?
Bumo deez nuts.
What did the suicidal guy say to his audience?
What did the suicidal guy say to his audience?
Say "sukki" 10 times fast.
Meant to say my friend's nan, not man.
I would like to thank my favorite President Barack Obama. Sorry, Barack Obama and my uncle Obama bin Laden. I mean Osama bin Laden. Sorry, hummus in my throat.
What did the dinosaur say to the man?
It didn’t, they're dead.
Obama: It smells like UpNigga in here...
Trump: What's UpNigga?
Obama: Omg did you say the n word?? Die!!!
Q: If a cat says to a dog, "All dogs are liars," and the dog says to the cat, "All cats are liars," what does it mean?
A: It means cats and dogs can talk.
Can you really wheel my real wheelchair?
Try saying that over and over fast. Bit of a tongue twister.
Why is he called Stephen Hawking?
Because he is always trying to hawk up phlegm to clear his throat.
My friend said they were going to make a comeback. I told them to do it at the back of the throat.
You failed Helen Keller's speech class? It's okay, she's not a very good speaker.
My name must taste good because it’s always in your mouth.
Má ég fara heim?
(In an infant-esque voice.)
Bitch, I can make orange rhyme with banana.
BORNANA
I say what Kay’s jesjejejeeuedeeeeeeee.