Speech jokes
When someone says "Did I ask?" say "Then why did you respond?"
If I could make someone tell me their last words, they'd say, "Make me."
Say "traffic," and replace "r" with "h." It sounds like... that thicc.
What was I saying again?
What do you call a dwarf with borderline autism? Jimothy.
Once I told an abortion joke and this woman was like, "I've had an abortion, that's offensive." And I was like, "I just tell jokes, I think what you do is much worse."
Say "ocean" 5 times and you say "oh shit!"
What do cheap people use to talk?
Free speech.
China, unban Google, r.n. noOoOooOw!
Whoever put an "s" in the word "lisp" was a jackass!
Warning! Warning! Warning! Warning!
"What? Where?"
They asked me to speak at this funeral, and I said, "Of corpse!"
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Little old lady.
Little old lady who?
I didn’t know you could yodel!
What's the difference between a rooster and a prostitute?
The rooster says... "cock-a-doodle-doo." The prostitute says... "any cock will do."
Yes yes yes the yes yes he did but what u tolk xjxfjgjcmbjhdkggdjlud.
As a scientist, I confirm that you speak too fast. It has a speed of 1 bullshit per second.
Do you want to hear a joke?
Never mind, it’s too punny.
Stop making moo jokes, they're so annoying!
Cock.
What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
Aye, matey!
Quit making jokes about me.