They asked me to speak at this funeral, and I said, "Of corpse!"
Speech Jokes
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Little old lady.
Little old lady who?
I didn’t know you could yodel!
What's the difference between a rooster and a prostitute?
The rooster says... "cock-a-doodle-doo." The prostitute says... "any cock will do."
Yes yes yes the yes yes he did but what u tolk xjxfjgjcmbjhdkggdjlud.
Do you want to hear a joke?
Never mind, it’s too punny.
Stop making moo jokes, they're so annoying!
Cock.
What did the pirate say on his 80th birthday?
Aye, matey!
Quit making jokes about me.
What time is it when you get home and you can walk, walk? Eeeeeew!
I like my new... e-a-tree and a tree that is a magic house and a tree tree and a...
A person went to tell a joke: "Knock knock!" "Who’s there?" "I don’t remember!" (I think we need to moove on to the next joke now.)
I just now made this one up! Then I realized it is in the cow category, so I added the moove on part! 😂
What is boring? Talking about boring things.
What is the best power that man can do? They can move the mountain with their tongue.
What's a pirate's favorite key on the keyboard?
Others: R.
Rrrr, you would think so, but it be the C.
Say "Mike Wizowski" fast to a teenager and I will get you $100000000000.
What did the cow say to your mom?
Hello.
What do gay horses say?
"Hay ya'lllllllllllllll!"
Two muffins are sitting in a bar.
The first muffin says to the bartender, "I'll have the usual."
The second one does not say anything to the bartender because muffins lack the vocal ability of humans, and even with the proper anatomy capable of speech access, they would most certainly be entirely unable to comprehend the human language. In fact, the first muffin would indefinitely not be able to provide speech to the bartender. The muffins also lack the muscular structure to be capable of support themselves to being suspended also preventing their access to movement. Even with the human-like structure, muffins lack brains, which are an essential part of being able to send nerve contact within the legs to be able to move. Also, with them lacking a brain structure entirely prevents them from speech. The anatomy simply prohibits the food items mentioned to be able to carry out any of the tasks required to get them to said bar and be able to speak, thus making the situation untruthful and completely idiotic.
Once my friend was saying something dumb, and I was like, "I Campbell-eve you just said that."
