Sound jokes
Why did the clock out the library?
It tocked too much!
I've just started a new business making people breathe in large amounts of helium. They all speak very highly of it.
About a dog.
What’s the difference between a hoe and a rooster?
A rooster says, "Cock-a-doodle-doo," and a hoe says, "Any cock will do."
The butt quack one.
"I hear you asking, 'What's your favorite instrument?' The Trombone."
What sound does a nut make when it sneezes? Cashew.
Being gay sounds like a pain in the ass.
Knock, knock.
Who's there?
Who.
Who who?
Stop acting like an owl!
What do crows use when they get a phone?
A "CAWing" card!
What happens when Stephen Hawking dies? Windows plays the shutdown music.
My bird. PRETTY BIRD! PRETTY BIRD!
Others CHIRP CHIRP CHIRP!
Q: Why did the elephant paint his toenails red?
A: To hide up cherry trees.
Q: What's the loudest noise in the jungle?
A: Giraffes eating cherries.
Why do ducks have feathers?
To cover their butt quacks.
How do cows say "oof?"
They say, "MOOf."
What is a cow's favorite move? -- The sound of moooosic.
You want to hear a dirty joke?
This guy and this girl were having sex when the guy's boss called to ask why he wasn't at work. The guy responds, "I'm sick." His boss replies, "You don't sound sick." The guy says, "I'm fucking my sister" and hangs up the phone.
Say this out loud: Alpha Kenny One.
CHABI CHABI CHAB CHAAAAB!
Why Jake?
FRRR N