SOS jokes

Two guys were on a hunting trip, and after the first day of hunting, they didn’t see anything, so they decided the next day they would split up and meet back at the fire at dinner time.

After a day of hunting, they meet back at the fire, and one hunter asked the other, “How did your day go?”

The one hunter said, “I had the best day ever! I went down the hill and hunted by the train tracks and saw the hottest chick ever. We had sex for hours in every position you could think of.”

Then the other hunter asked him, “Was she a good lookin’ blond?” And he said, “Oh, I don’t know, I didn’t find her head.”

An orphan walks into a shop but gets lost, so he calls his mum but then remembers.

A teacher wanted to sing, so she did. This is what she said:

"You have no family, even though you're broker than me."

Your mum is so cute that I asked for her number and she said yes, and now we're dating.

Yo, your hairline so messed up God said your hairline on the cross getting hit on that cross.

Your hairline is so bad, it goes back in time!

Why do Mexicans wear pointed boots?

So they can climb a fence easier.

Your hairline is so expired, it’s more expired than your milk!

Your mama's so fat, when she stepped on the scale, it said, "To be continued."

Why is America so bad at Clash of Clans? Because we already lost two towers.

You're so fat that people say you're the biggest bird!

Your hairline is so curved that McDonald's hired you to be their "M."

I was at the bank yesterday.

A lady asked to check her balance, so I pushed her over.

Joe Mama so fat when she stepped on the sidewalk, I didn't laugh, but the sidewalk cracked up.

Your mama is so fat, by the time I swerved to miss her with the car, I ran out of gas.

Your mama is so fat. She gets winded just thinking about running.

Yo mama so fat, she eat 60 Big Macs while singing "Badaaha."

Your mama is so fat that when she went to run in a yellow jumpsuit, the kids thought they missed the school bus.

Lil Nas X is so gay, I would fuck him in the Old Town Road.

Why [doesn't] Hollywood make a good movie about holocausts?

Because it's so hard to skin Jewish characters.