SOS jokes

Yo mama's so ugly, when she was little, she had to trick-or-treat by phone.

So there’s this air purifier in my room, right? It’s really noisy, so I unplugged it to sleep better, and sure enough, I fell asleep faster. So I came to the conclusion: if I unplug noisy machines, people will sleep better.

It worked really well in my local hospital.

Sally had 9 pounds of boobs (9), which was 2 2 many (922), so on the 9th of the month (9229) at 6pm (92296) on 68 street (922968), she went to doctor x to get 6 operations (922968x6) and left her (flip your calculator) boobless.

Your hairline is so back when the police saw it, they had to arrest you.

Why did the dinosaur take a bath?

So it can get ex-stinked!

Why are orphans so naughty at school? It's not like the teacher is gonna call their parents.

My ex wanted to humiliate me in front of her friends, so she said I was useless in bed.

Should have seen her face when they all disagreed.

Why was six so scared of seven? Because seven ate nine.

Why are Americans so bad at Clash Royale? Because they already lost two towers.

The plane said to the tower, "You're so cute, I want to come crashing into your arms!"

Last post for today, but I had to say one more thing! Tomorrow I am going to Six Flags, and I am literally so excited! It is going to be so much fun. Hope you guys have a good MLK JR. day! Woohooo!

Yo mama's so stupid, she put lipstick on her forehead to make up her mind.

Yo mama's so stupid, when thieves broke into her house and stole the TV, she chased after them shouting, "Wait, you forgot the remote!"

Yo mama's so stupid, she got locked in the grocery store and starved to death.

Yo mama's so ugly, she made a blind kid cry.

Yo mama's armpits are so hairy, it looks like she's got Buckwheat in a headlock.

What kind of birthday cake do you get on September 11th?

Three small ones, so you can have a flight of different cake flavors!

You are so ugly, when you looked in the mirror your reflection walked away.

Santa's sack is big because he only comes once a year, but his sack is SO BIG after containing the lovely eggnog he has that those weigh the sleigh.

He never had kids because he comes in the chimney.

Yo momma so fat that she was used as a tank in Putin's war.