SOS jokes

Nah! You're so poor, you can't afford free stuff!

Your mama is so fat, when scientists discovered her, they thought it was a new galaxy.

You're so short, when it rains you're the last one to know.

Yo mama so stupid, she stared at a bottle of orange juice for 12 hours because it said "concentrate."

I went to a book store yesterday and I saw a book that said "how to solve 50% of your problems." So I bought 2.

Your mum is so overdue on eBay for £2 so she could get a male stripper.

Your mum is so fat, when she reached for the remote, when she found it, it was crushed.

Son: What's for dinner tonight?

Mom: Steak!

Son: Mom, you know I only eat veggies, so what's for me?

Mom: HUNGER!

Someone asked me to go to hell, so I drove to my local middle school.

Your forehead is so big, you think in 4K.

Yo mama's so fat her belly button has an echo.

Yo mama so fat, when she talks to herself, it’s a long-distance call.

You are so fat that the last time you stepped on the weighing scale, the doctor said, "I want your weight and not [your] phone number."

Your mama is so ugly! It took your dad 15 years to return from getting milk.

Okay, so one time a deaf kid got into a car accident, but he didn't herd in on the news.

So Mungus.

Why are Americans so bad at Clash of Clans?

They already lost two towers.

Yo mama's so fat, I swerved to miss her in my car and ran out of gas.

Yo mama's so fat, when she goes camping, the bears hide their food.

Yo mama's so stupid, when I said, "Drinks on the house," she got a ladder.