Sometimes Jokes

sometimes i look around and all i see is 2 fat cheeks in my face and say 2 mushy apples

Sometimes I wish my grass was depressed, then it would just cut itself.

My enemy likes to act like he’s stupid sometimes, and so once he asked me what a sin was, and I responded with, “you.”

How come Mr Squirrel watches porn sometimes? Sometimes he feels like a nut, sometimes he don't

One day i visited my friend in a hospital I remember when i spoke "You know, sometimes it's reaching its peak and its lowest state, but i know you'll always end like the others at calming and straight" Yes, i talked about heart monitor beside him

My dad owns a countertop store and sometimes he'll barter. A lot of the time he will take things for granite. A lot of counter-offers were made.

Sometimes I feel ugly but then I think of my sister

Sometime ago I went to the morgue and asked if they took walk-ins.

Hey, guys! Just a quick reminder to spread kindness today. And treat others how you want to be treated! Rate your day scale of 1-10 in the comments below. Mine was about a 7. Also, can you guys please comment what you guys want me to cover in these little messages? Sometimes it's hard to tell if you guys like that I'm doing this kind of stuff or not.

Dam, sometimes when I look at my friends head I say dam, that's a dam big head Nick, then he is like, dude, that's a literal dam.

“Well,” he says, “It’s what mommy calls me sometimes.”

The little girl screams, “Don’t eat it! It’s a fucking asshole.”

I sometimes want rampage, but what good would that do? I look for a way out, but there's not even a light shining through. The times where all is dark, are the times that I need a mark. Though people say that nobody will care, the truth is: there's always one who's fair. That person may not be the one you expect, but I am here with a passion to redirect. Once there was a time where I tried to end it all, because I only looked on the dark side. Truth was I wanted to be heard, to be respected, to let someone know. But that was in the past and this isn't about my dark ride, it's time for others to know that only a few words, can extinguish a glow.