Why do orphans go to church?
They have someone to call "father" there.
Someone Jokes
Whenever someone calls me ugly, I get super sad and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.
Yo momma so stupid, when someone got cardiac arrest, she tried to put the person to court, and when the judge said "ORDER AT THE COURT," she thought it's a food court and ordered 20 Big Macs and got a heart attack.
What do you call it when you're trying to find out what someone had for lunch?
An ingestigation.
Why did the orphan cheat on his girlfriend with a guy?
Because he wanted someone to call "Mommy" and "Daddy."
Ask someone if they are a rhino. If they say yes, tell them "so you're horny." And if they reply yes again, block them from your life entirely.
Why do orphans want a sugar daddy?
They actually can call someone "daddy!"
When someone calls you, say "Welcome to Joe's Pizza Abortion Clinic, your loss is our sauce."
Like, if you hate wearing a mask.
Every time I'm out in public, and I see someone without their mask, I always feel like there is something extra special about them. Then I realize that I can see all their face!
True story by the way.
Say this when showing this website to someone: "You know, it's too bad this website doesn't have a homepage."
Why can't an orphan be in a Scream movie?
It's always someone you know.
What's the difference between a tornado and a divorce down south?
Nothing. Someone's losing a trailer.
Why was the people's wedding so miserable...
'Cause during the kiss someone farted so loud and stinky, they agreed to never try to have another wedding.
The Britains walk in the house of the alcoholic grandad. They ask Mary, the mum, why she had blood all over her, and she said someone dropped the butter. They walked into the living room, and Thomas was dead on the floor.
There is someone in my class named Henry Rocket Rueben, and he always says he rockets into my mom.
Someone cutting the cheese then farted.
Someone sees the cheese, and it smelled like crap (literally). He said, "Who cut the cheese?"
Why do orphans go to church so they can call someone "father?"
I went to the table to eat my egg, but I couldn't find it anywhere.
I think someone must've poached it.
I prank called someone and I said, "Is there a Missis Wall there?" They said no. Is there a Mr. Wall there? They said no. Are there any Walls there? They said no. Then what's holding up your building?
What's the difference between someone with dystonia and someone with misophonia?
One makes the annoying noises, while the other hates the annoying noises.
