Someone jokes

Blowjob

How is tightrope walking like getting a blowjob from someone ugly?

If you want to enjoy either, you absolutely can’t look down.

Trash

"One man's trash is another man's treasure" is a great thing to say to someone; horrible way to find out you're adopted.

Momma

Yo momma so stupid, when someone got cardiac arrest, she tried to put the person to court, and when the judge said "ORDER AT THE COURT," she thought it's a food court and ordered 20 Big Macs and got a heart attack.

Teacher

I hope next time you ask your teacher to go to the toilet, your teacher says no, but when someone else asks, the teacher says yes to them.

Memes

Gun

What do Hitler's gas "shower" and guns have in common? They both kill someone.

Villain

If I had a dime for every time I heard someone say that F was the villain (Alphabet Lore), I would be rich.

Orphanage

A kid came to the orphanage with a dead fish. She was crying.

Why was the kid crying in the orphanage? Because someone came for the fish.

Life

Whenever someone calls me ugly, I get super sad and hug them, because I know how tough life is for the visually impaired.

Sign

Solicitors are more likely to harass someone with a “no soliciting” sign on their front porch.

Paper

Say _______ is so flat that when someone hit them, they got a paper cut!

Orphan

Why did the orphan cheat on his girlfriend with a guy?

Because he wanted someone to call "Mommy" and "Daddy."

Rhino

Ask someone if they are a rhino. If they say yes, tell them "so you're horny." And if they reply yes again, block them from your life entirely.

Website

Say this when showing this website to someone: "You know, it's too bad this website doesn't have a homepage."

Divorce

What's the difference between a tornado and a divorce down south?

Nothing. Someone's losing a trailer.