Someone Jokes

What’s the difference between a police man and a bullet?

At least when a bullet kills someone, it’s actually fired.

Please don't get mad, it's a joke.

What's the difference between a bullet and a police officer? At least when a bullet kills someone, it's fired.

Someone threatened to break into my house, but I am in a wheelchair. I said sure, and I moved everything upstairs and sat on the stairs so he couldn’t steal anything.

How did the coke seller react when someone told him a joke?

He CRACKed up.

What do you call it when someone fucks shoe inserts?

Orthopediphilia.

A close up image shows a chipmunk with its cheeks puffed out, filled with food. The text overlay says, "WHEN YOU ALREADY STARTED EATING AND SOMEONE SAYS 'LETS PRAY'"

I found someone's hairline. It was on the western front.

Why did the orphan turn gay?

A: Because he wanted someone to call him "daddy."

Why do orphans always go to white vans when someone asks?

Because they want to feel wanted.

Why did the orphan become a stripper?

To have someone to call "daddy!"

How do you know someone is fucking dumb?

They put jokes that have been used several times already.

What do you say after you throw an egg at someone? "Yolks on you!"

My parents said to me, "Whenever you say sorry to someone and they say, 'It's okay,' it's really not."

So I said, "Okay."

There's nothing quite like being told I'm wrong by someone who depends on me for food, clothing, and shelter.

If you ever think no one cares about you,

kill someone, then the news will.

Attention! Has anyone noticed that Watersharky and Kitten are dating? It's strange because they haven't said anything for 28 DAYS!!! They been keeping it a secret...(I guess). Someone needs to keep track of this. GOD, I just thought further into life with their relationship. DON'T DO THAT.