Society jokes
What's the difference between 5% of priests and 5% of atheists?
5% of atheists have seen a ghost.
5% of priests have spooked altar boys in the sacristy.
Your family is so poor, when you knocked on the door for money, I offered you a penny, and when you knocked again, the rock answered and knocked you out.
What's the difference between a Catholic priest and the devil?
The devil always has horns... not just around children.
Why does the Please Touch Museum sound like "police touch museum?"
Because they gotta watch out for the pedos.
Q: What did the late cannibal get when he got to the party?
A: A cold shoulder.
Memes
Why do orphans rob banks?
Because they want to be wanted.
Why are orphans good at dodge ball?
Because no one misses them.
What is the difference between men and women?
Men have 2 heads, women have 4 lips because men do all the thinking, and women do all the talking.
Food makers are proudly presenting human flesh-made foods. Donate your useless friends and family to us because we're saving lives.
T and C apply. This is only in the best shops in your town, or down the road, or in your country. 1 like = 1 family member donated 'cause we're saving lives😎😎
Why are life and a penis alike?
Women make both of them hard.
What takes 10 parking spaces? Five women.
Bruh, the cops just arrested a black dude...
Well nvm, they shot him dead.
Yeah, so why can't a blind woman drive?
Exactly, cuz she's a woman.
Why can’t orphans play baseball? 'Cause they can’t find home plate.
What's the difference between cotton and an orphan?
One gets picked.
Madeline McCann must have been homeless or something, she was sure eager for the free candy.
Q: What's the difference between a suicide vest and a feminist?
A: At least one does something when it is triggered.
Why shouldn't orphans get a phone?
They would get stuck in an app because they can't find the home button.
Why do orphans do so well in life?
When people told them "Go big or go home," they only had one option.
The COVID-19 situation has been especially stressful for the Flat Earth Society.
They fear that social distancing measures could push people over the edge.