What do you call a fart in a gay bar?
A mating call.
Who hates going to a pizza party?
A weirdough.
Yesterday I went to a party at my friend’s house. Everyone was dressed as birthday candles. It was a blowout.
Why did Peter bring toilet roll to the party? Because he was a party pooper!
I went to a feminist picnic the other day.
It was great, apart from the fact no one made any sandwiches.
When you meet your gf at the family reunion.
What were the candles doing at a birthday party?
Getting lit.
Why should you never talk to pie at a party? Because it goes on forever.
Every time my grandmother and I were at a wedding, she’d say: “you’re next.” So I started saying the same thing to her at funerals.
What is an orphan's family reunion called?
Me time.
Why can't the skeleton go to the dance?
Because he has "no body" to go with!
What do you call a gay barbecue?
LGTBBQ.
A lady walked into a bar and ordered their special drink. The bartender then gave her a brown glass full of milk. The lady complained about this, but then the bartender said, "Just shut up and swallow!"
Why does an orphan cry on Thanksgiving?
Family gathering.
I love it when your parents come round for Christmas. I just wish we couldn't hear them through the ceiling.
A girl invites her friends to come to her birthday party, and at the party, one of her friends poops their pants.
When Sally finds out, she yells, “I never should have invited you to my party! You are a party pooper!”
This man walks into a bar and says, "How do I get service here?"
The assistant bar attendant tells him to take a seat as the bartender will be there to serve him shortly. After 2 minutes, the man says this is ridiculous, that he has to wait. The assistant then offers him a bar snack of free nuts, which the man duly eats. Another 2 minutes go by, and the man then says, "OK, I get it, no service of beer, but free nuts," to which the assistant says, "Hell no, the game starts in 10 minutes." Everyone laughs and claps.
What did the math teacher write on his party invitations?
Be there or B2.
A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar.
The bartender looks at them and says, "What is this? Some kind of joke?"
Once we went to a light bulb party last night, YO it was freakin lit.
