Snack jokes
(True story) Today I was bringing some tortilla chips upstairs for some chips and dip, and I dropped them, so my mom goes “Oh, now they’re broken.”
And I took an opportunity to make a pun, so I said, “No, they’re just chipped.”
What are two plus sides to being an orphan?
1. All your snacks are family sized.
2. No one can make jokes about your mama.
Why do orphans love chips?
Because every bag of chips is family size.
Why did the M&M go to school?
It wanted to be a Smartie.
What do you call a nacho that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese.
detos
Zozo the hobo is single like a Pringle.
Single like a Pringle, and he loves Pringle's, get it?
What's the difference between a porn star and a mosquito?
One stops sucking when you smack it.
The most corrupt CEOs are those of the pretzel companies.
They’re always so twisted!
Before I die, I'm going to ask to be cremated.
Then I'm going to eat a bunch of popcorn kernels.
Then I'll die and get cremated. BOOM! I'm popcorn!
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
Because he lost his filling.
What is 6 inches and long?
A Slim Jim.
What do we want? A cure for obesity.
When do we want it? After lunch.
Why do orphans love chips?
Because they're all family sized.
Peanut butter 🧈?
What do you call cheese that isn't yours?
Nacho cheese.
How do you get a baby into a small bowl?
A blender.
How do you get it out? Tostito chips.
What do you call a black person in a swimming pool?
Coco Pops.
My friend says, "You should try Oreos with water."
Me: No, because my dad actually came back with the milf.
What's worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Half of it. 🐛
What chips are you not allowed to give to orphans?
Family size.