Skin jokes
Do you have a sunburn, or are you just always this hot?
Why can Michael Jackson not play chess? Because he can't pick which side he is on, the white or black side.
3 men walk up to Indians, one American, one Muslim, and one African American. The Indians say, "We're all gonna kill you." One of the men asks why. The Indian says, "So we can use your skin to make kyanks." He also says, "Y'all decide how you die." The Muslim says, "I want to drown," so they drown him. The African American says, "Shoot me." And the American grabs a fork and starts poking himself everywhere, I mean everywhere. The Indian said, "What's the point of this?" and the American says, "F**k your kyanks."
If your butt hurts real bad, put some vapor rub and booty cream on it so it can heal back to normal.
Trump is so orange that he makes the Oompa Loompas look white.
So, you're human, huh? Well, I'm a skeleton, so not much gets under my skin.
What did the funny bone say to the skin?
"You're not humerus, I am!"
A famous celebrity admitted that she was non-straight, suffered from a rare condition that changed the colour of her skin, did not age well, only wanted to be compensated for her work in the 5th month of each year at her favourite store while laying down:
TO GET FAYE'S WAY, PAY GRAY, GRAY, GAY FAYE WRAY IN MAY AND LAY HER DOWN AT "THE BAY". OK!!!
I've been taking Viagras for sunburn.
It keeps the sheets off my bed at night!
Beneath this monumental stone Lise, 80 pounds of skin and bone.
Teacher: What does the pig's skin do?
Student: It keeps pig skin together! 😂
Me: Now I know why Michael Jackson turned white.
The police: You finally figured it out.
What's the difference between a mole and a priest?
One will till your 13 to put hairs on your face.
Just to get things straight, I'm NOT, I repeat, NOT racist, but this joke goes out to all the people who talk about other people with darker skin than the other person.
Bully: Your skin is so black and ugly (for the 5th time).
Me: I'm so happy you love my skin color!
Bully: Ew, no I don't!
Me: Then why do you keep talking about it?
I don't know why Trump has orange skin but has white around his eyes. So does that mean he is some fucking dog?
If you have a broken bone, do you have broken skin?
Someone walked into a cancer ward and asked for a skin fade.
So Joe was at the store and he was looking for a dildo.
Then he saw one made out of dick skin, so he grabbed it and uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh uh UhuhUhUhUhUhuHuHuHuHUHUHUHUHUHUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH went his mouth.
PENIS PENIS
What’s the difference between a pimple and a Priest?
You see, a pimple wouldn’t normally come on a kid until he’s 13 years old.
What comes to visit more often than your aunt? Your acne.