Skepticism jokes

One day, a priest is walking down the street and sees a little girl with a box. "What's in the box?" the priest asks. "Christian kittens," the little girl answers.

Pleased, the priest smiles and continues on his way.

A week later, the same priest is walking down the street with a nun when he sees the little girl and the box again. "Ask her what she has in the box," he says, "It's the cutest thing!"

The nun walks up and asks the girl what she has in the box. "Atheist kittens," she says.

The priest rushes forward and says, "ATHEIST KITTENS!!! Last week you said they were 'Christian kittens!!!'"

"They were," she says. "Now their eyes are open."

What do the initials BIBLE stand for?

Bull In Book Lacking Evidence

A blonde and a redhead have a ranch. They have just lost their bull.

The women need to buy another, but only have $500. The redhead tells the blonde, "I will go to the market and see if I can find one for under that amount. If I can, I will send you a telegram."

She goes to the market and finds one for $499. Having only one dollar left, she goes to the telegraph office and finds out that it costs one dollar per word. She is stumped on how to tell the blonde to bring the truck and trailer. Finally, she tells the telegraph operator to send the word "comfortable."

Skeptical, the operator asks, "How will she know to come with the trailer from just that word?" The redhead replies, "She's a blonde so she reads slow: 'Come for ta bull.'"

What do you call an atheist bone? -- A blasfemur.

At first I was skeptical, but the universe has really grown on me.

"Left, center, right, and apolitical, also skeptical, are also a joke."

Autists either believe everything you tell them or are nonstop skeptics. There is no in-between.

Remember, if you are suffering from paranoia...

You are not alone.

My friends: Ugh, why are you so lazy and no fun?

My parents: Why can't you be like your siblings?

My teacher: I don't care if you're depressed, focus on your study!

The songs: We understand you :)

Poor Stephen Hawking couldn't pass the "I'm not a robot" test.

I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer.

I saw it through my telescope last night.

No one has the right to look down on others unless you're perfect, and looking down on others is not perfect either.

It's just true.