Sister

Sister jokes

Masturbation

I saw my sisters masturbating with cucumbers and hotdogs.

I said, "Come on, I was gonna eat that later! Now it's just gonna taste like hotdogs and cucumbers!"

Month

This was a few months ago. I used to help people load and unload inventory. One day I’m driving home after having lunch with my sister, and she asked if we can stop at the next gas station. I told her, "So you can weigh yourself on the truck scale?"

Parent

My parents raised me as an only child, which infuriated my sister.

Memes

Gold Digger

Family all eating at the table.

Brother: "Hmm, I think I feel gold."

Sister: "Stop the cap."

Brother looks under the table and says, "Nope, just a gold digger."

Dad laughed.

Stepmom storms out of the room.

Hive

I saw a girl at my job and we ended up fucking, then the test came back and I have hives from my sister.

Trash

I have trash so I throw it at my sister and say that she is a trash can.

Period

How do you know if your sister's on her period?

Your dad's dick tastes funny.

What's worse than fingering your sister?

Finding your dad's wedding ring inside her.

Family

My older sister said she was gonna shoot herself, so I did it for her.

Singing

Sister: Wanna know the difference between your singing and your flute playing?

Me: Sure... (Expecting a completely different response than what I get.)

Sister: Nvm, they have no difference.

Me: *Confused*

Sister: They're both horrible.

Fight

You and your sister always get into a fight and she says, "I don't care." Then you say right away, "About you!"

Onion

Your sister is so stupid, she only thinks an onion will make people cry.

So I threw a coconut at her.

Mountain

Your sister is so stupid, when she saw Mountain Dew, she went to the top of a mountain to get it.