Sister jokes

Suck!

Your sister is so stupid, she only thinks an onion will make people cry.

So I threw a coconut at her.

Your sister is so stupid, when she saw Mountain Dew, she went to the top of a mountain to get it.

Your sister is so ugly that she made an onion cry.

You and your sister always get into a fight and she says, "I don't care." Then you say right away, "About you!"

My older sister said she was gonna shoot herself, so I did it for her.

Knock, knock.

Who is there?

Deez.

Deez who?

Deez nuts!

Why do orphans play with other kids on a playground?

So they will sneak into their parents' car to be a brother or sister.

Family all eating at the table.

Brother: "Hmm, I think I feel gold."

Sister: "Stop the cap."

Brother looks under the table and says, "Nope, just a gold digger."

Dad laughed.

Stepmom storms out of the room.

Why did Ronald McDonald go to KFC to destroy them?

Why don't Jedi like their female relatives?

Because they are Sith-ters.

As an older brother, I always gave my little sister advice. I always said to do your best and never quit. So one day I went to her room. I see my sister giving married men blow jobs.

I ask what are you doing? The married men said she is giving us blow jobs because our wives don't do it. My sister said you told me to do your best, and my best is to suck them dry. As a brother, I couldn't be more prouder.

One day I was walking along the street and I found some caution tape... Just sitting there torn up... Beat up, and you could barely unravel it anymore because I would just burst into shreds... It kinda reminded me of what happened to my sister's killer... They still haven’t found him yet... I’m really good at hide and seek!

My mom is in the FBI. My dad is in the FBI. My sister is in the FBI. My brother is in the FBI. And do you know what I am?

Divorced.

I got stuck in the dryer again. Brother, say less.

bals

Hey everyone, I'm back because I'm sinking back towards depression because my sister is really being a bitch, and my parents always side with her, and the stress over online school is just getting overwhelming, and I'm seriously considering hanging myself to end it all because the pain is just... terrible, and I feel like I'm not worth life.

What's one thing your dad shares with black men? Your sister.

My sister is so stupid, she thought LBJ was Spanish for blowjob.

My pathological cheater of a sister wanted to play a board game with me.

I turned her down because I didn't like the Risk involved.